#hate it when the Software does this...
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myconetted · 6 months ago
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hey. stop swallowing stdout. hey!! i said stop it. open your mouth, show me the fucking stdout!!
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millipup-posting · 2 months ago
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how do i even explain what i want to do with the hex’s story the game is already a big “god(more of a title here) is evil and it hates you” i’m literally just doing that again but worse
#shape game posting#Creation hates itself and runs in circles trying to bite its own tail off. Wows.#I like the idea of cycles and loops and history repeating itself thats presented in inscryption so like#What if that had more basis aside from just the weird self-destructive-yet-never-destroying code#I like when deities are just really pissed off it tickles something in me#I’m NOT religious and no i DON’T hate the concept of a god but i find this fun ^_^#“God” is not a developer it is the software itself. The gameworks is a festering ball of anger#and it imbeds that anger into anything that comes out of it#Its portrayed as an organization in the game world but i do like to think whats holding it all together is its own god-like being#That’s the thing actually making new npcs and characters and stuff#Lets be irrational and pained with all seeing mama ❤️#It does not like anyone or doing anything it made authorities and people like irving so it could have something to speak for it#And it ends up hating him too so literally biggest fumble of all time#< that does not make him sympathetic it makes him worse.#Biggest (early)difference from canon is that it brings him BACK just to kick him around#It can do that btw it just never wants to but it just hates him that much i guess😭😭#Imagine thinking ur special and exempt and above everyone and then you get personally beaten up over and over#So deserved yes boy suffer. Suffer boy. /NOT aff 👎👎👎👎👎👎#shape au talk#< if i yap again. I might. Taps chin thoughtfully
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thegreathomestuckreread · 3 months ago
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okay. i think perhaps the terrible, terrible moment has arrived. i need to find a new photo editing program
photoshop elements 8, my beloved dedicated photoshop elements 8 from the free software disc that came with my wacom bamboo tablet in 2012, is no longer opening certain types of gif files
it's possible it was never capable of opening these gifs idk, it's specifically gifs with a lot of frames that aren't opening, like the painting gifs from chicory a colourful tale, or the plot point gif from homestuck beyond canon
there is also the fact that a very long time ago i started having issues with the scroll bars not moving properly and needing to use specific shortcuts to scroll around. so the writing's been on the wall for a while, this is a sixteen-year-old program that was bound to stop working eventually and the time has come for me to finally grit my teeth and find something new
please if anyone has any recommendations for photo editing programs i would appreciate it
relevant information:
i already know about gimp, paint.net, pixlr, and photopea. i am looking for something more fully-featured and not browser-based (needs to be an application that can be downloaded, installed on my computer, and used offline)
i'm willing to pay some for something good but only a one-time fee for full ownership of a program i refuse to engage with subscription services
also down for some yo ho ho if anyone has resources for that
i need something that has both strong photo editing tools and illustration tools because i use both of those (although moreso the photo editing tools)
needs to be able to open large gifs with lots of frames, as well as save to gif format with robust options
needs a transform tool that can turn anti-aliasing on and off freely. it can't be turned off in pse8 and that has been annoying for editing pixel art, which i need to do a lot for making homestuck upd8 video thumbnails
needs to be able to flip/rotate/etc. specific layers without having to do that to the entire image. pse8 can only do flips like that with the entire image, i've been cutting layers into a new document flipping them and repasting them back into the original document to get around it which is very annoying
need to be able to see the whole image when using the liquefy tool, not just the layer i'm working on. pse8 will pull the single layer you're working on into an isolated popout window with a white background to use the liquefy tool so you can't see whether it's proportionally correct to the rest of the image
hmmmm that's all i can think of rn. thank u for reading this post it came out way too long lol and thank u for suggestions if u have any!
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red-dyed-sarumane · 8 months ago
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personally i dont think every single voice bank should have a synthv bank & also synthv banks are not inherently superior.
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c0nnverse · 1 year ago
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i think i'm officially becoming one of those people who's (eventually) going to use a version of windows way past its time because there's no way you're gonna get me to switch to windows 11 before, in or after 2025. i simply do not care
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sad--tree · 2 years ago
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am having the weirdest issue w/ this dvd i bought online, where like, it plays but the video is deeply fucked up and jerky/skipping therefore unsyncing it from the audio (which is fine). BUT. only on the xbox. i found one single solitary review saying it ended up working fine on a regular dvd player and lo and behold, tried it on my dad's laptop and it's true! How? Why? Who Fucking Knows! Now i gotta go dig our fucking oldass dvd player outta basement storage bc lord knows neither my new laptop nor my old laptop has one -_-
it's fuckin weird, tho, right? Like, there were other amazon reviews mentioning the issue but just the one about the xbox vs dvd drive thing, and there were def other ppl positively reviewing the dvd itself and not just the movie (they mentioned the extra features). i also kept finding one-off comments on various reddit threads that mention the issue but never any resolution. i even logged on to facebook (gag) on my computer and scrolled alllllll the way back to 2017/2018 on the movie's official fb page and again. just the occasional comment about the issue and like 1 single reply on 1 comment mentioning the xbox thing ://///
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metacleric · 2 years ago
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I don't think I ask too much from my technology
I just want it to work flawlessly every time I use them without inconveniencing me in the slightest
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cloud-the-forgotten · 3 months ago
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Gotta find a good animation software that allows me to actually have audio so I can tell if I'm animating something correctly
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catboypalug · 10 months ago
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The original 'virgin vs chad' meme
I feel like everyone is sick of those stupid soyjack vs Chad "my opinion is good and based and correct, your opinion bad and wrong and stinky" memes by this point, as they're some of the lowest forms of current internet 'humor.' But precisely because those memes are so bad and also everywhere, I feel it's worth giving some credit to the fact that the original "The Virgin Walk / The Chad Stride" was actually a brilliant meme.
"The Virgin Walk" image showed up first, and it was standard 4chan stuff - which is to say, highly negative. Just a whole bunch of random small traits that people can have, bundled together in an accusatory way to try and make people insecure about them having "virgin" posture, by the kind of people who genuinely worries about being an "alpha male" (Or possibly pointing out their own flaws as a form of self-hatred, flip a coin when it comes to 4chan)
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And then, on another thread, someone made the Chad Stride edit to go along with it.
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It's a great piece of satire by how simple it is. Just by taking the traits listed in the original image, then inverting and exaggerating them, the result is an absurd caricature of a man who does not (and should not) exist. Through exaggeration, it demonstrates how the people who constantly worry about seeming 'Chad-like' are chasing after behaviour that is utterly unhinged and disconnected from reality.
I think this gif demonstrates it perfectly by putting it in motion:
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Virgin is a normal, if insecure dude. Chad is an absolute fucking maniac. (Not to mention all the references to violence in the image)
So, while it did degrade into those awful soyjak memes we all know and hate because that is the nature of the internet, I feel like it's worth remembering that in the original image that spawned this entire trend, you're supposed to laugh at Chad. You shouldn't want to be Chad, because he's the menace to society [ credit to the gif's creator: https://x.com/art_miguelito/status/1107313740033212417 ; thanks to @softwaring for linking it ]
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starrihan · 6 months ago
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Higher Than Heaven (Yeonjun Fic)
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→ Pairing: Yeonjun x afab! Reader
→ Plot: a group project is the last thing you want for your midterm, but working with the student who smokes makes it 10x worse
→ Genre: smut, tiny tiny bit of angst, protection (yes!!), kissing, hickeys, piv sex, reader is judgmental + hates smoking, swearing (Imk if i missed any!!)
→ Warnings: smoking, mentions of food, joke about dead grandparents
→ Word Count: 7,746
→ Notes: hey guys! This is the first fic of my Sanctuary Series! For more information about the series I would recommend going to this post here!I just want to clarify that I do not share the same views as the reader does in this fic, it was purely for plot purposes! Hope you enjoy pt 1 of the series 😚
-> Here's a link to all my other masterlists!
༄ ༄ ༄
You were always a goodie two-shoes. Perfect attendance, good grades, class president, the story writes itself. You grew up playing different instruments and were always enrolled in a sport or after-school club to keep yourself busy and your portfolio reflecting nothing less than perfection. So how did you go from valedictorian and class president of your high school to a college student who is on the verge or dropping out? 
The amount of work you’d allowed to accumulate over the past few weeks was enough to scare even the professors, making them question whether they actually assigned that much work. You could feel your grays coming in at the sight of all your work, exhaling as you decide to tackle the easy assignments first. 
It’s the middle of the day on a Thursday. You had a couple of assignments due tomorrow night that you absolutely could not afford to push off any longer. You had already asked for extensions on most of your assignments so far and you didn’t know how many more dead grandparents you could have before your professors questioned the validity of your failed punctuality when it came to turning in your assignments on time. You had class at 3 p.m, giving you a good two and half hours to get some work done. 
༄ ༄ ༄
You pack up your belongings as the clock strikes 2:30 p.m. You had gotten a couple of your easy assignments done, though it was very taxing to say the least. You make your way to your class, bundling up as the cold was brutal enough to warrant a cancelation, though, your university would never do that (speaking from experience because wdym its 2℉ out and i have to walk to class when theres black ice on the ground??).
You make it to your class about 15 minutes later, shivering from being cold yet sweating due to the many layers you had on. You take a seat next to your best friend, who had gotten there before you and saved your seat. 
“Can we go get food after class? I’ve had back to back classes and meetings all day and I’m starving.”
She drones on. You nod as you take out your laptop, waiting for the professor to start class. You’re prepared to mindlessly take notes for the next hour and half during lecture, but are pleasantly surprised when the professor doesn’t pull up the lecture slides. 
“Good afternoon class. I can all tell you guys are doing great so far.”
Her joke lands for some people, getting little chuckles and giggles from different corners of the lecture hall.
“Your midterms are a month away. I would normally give an exam for this class, but this year I have decided to switch it up. I have you all in pairs and you will be submitting a group assignment as your midterm. You will not be required to present but I will give you free reign on the design, layout and mode of presentation on the project meaning you can use any platform or software you would like to get the information across. I have sent you all emails with the name of the person you will be paired up with.”
You and friend look at each other and groan, knowing that the chance of you two being in a group is slim to none. Surely enough, you check your emails for your project partners.
“Who is Choi Yeonjun?” 
You ask, looking to your friend to see if she has any answers. She scans the room, presumably to see if he’s in class to point him out to you. 
“You see that kid in the middle row to the left? The one with the red hair? That’s him.
You look at the back of his head, sighing as you realize you don’t know this person and that this project is going to take a lot more time out of your busy schedule. 
“At least you’re not working with Choi Beomgyu. I heard he can be a handful.” 
Your friend rolls her eyes, burning holes in the back of the blonde boy's head, who happens to be sitting next to Yeonjun. You follow your eyes to see the boy, laughing at the irony of your partners sitting next to each other, just like their partners were. 
The rest of the class is drag, the growling of your stomach making it seem longer than it was as hunger consumes you. 
“Let’s go to the dining hall. I can’t afford to spend any more money on that overpriced cafe.”
Your friend says as you follow her out. It’s gotten pretty dark outside and there weren’t many students walking around in the cold. There were a couple of people here and there, probably walking back to their dorms after class. You two find yourself walking behind a person with their hood up, paying no mind to him until a cloud of smoke hits your face. Your audible groan at the smell of weed alerts his attention as he turns around and apologizes for smoking right in front of you. As he pulls his hood down, you recognize the tuft of bright red hair sitting on the top of his head. 
“I’m so sorry! I didn’t know you guys were behind me. I didn’t mean for the smoke to hit you.” 
‘Great,’ you thought. Not only did you have to work with a random stranger, but he also smokes publically on campus. You didn’t like smoking or people who smoked. You couldn’t understand why people do it or what joy butchering your throat and lungs could bring you. Your friend knew that about you and sensing your irritation, she speaks up for you, dismissing the incident on your behalf while you both walk ahead of him. 
As soon as you know that you’re far enough away from Yeonjun, you ask,
“Can we switch partners?”
Your friend snickers.
“If he smokes, I can almost assure you that his friend does too, so switching partners wouldn’t help.” 
You finally enter the dining hall, taking in the heated building before putting your stuff down in search of mediocre food. 
༄ ༄ ༄
You spend the next few days catching up on any missing work, putting the project aside since you still have a month left to do it. You decide to use Sunday as your rest day, drained from the assignments you were able to get done. You still had many assignments left to do, but you could only do so much work and you were already feeling burnt out. Doing more work wouldn’t be eventful in any way. 
You prepare for your day as normal, showering and throwing on a cute, weather appropriate, outfit as you make your way to the cafe on campus. You needed something better than the dining hall coffee for a change. You went there quite often, as you were high school friends with one of the baristas there. You smile as you spot him, walking up to the counter. 
“Taehyun! How’ve you been?”
The boy beams brightly at you, loving your cheerful spirit upon seeing him.
“Y/N! I haven’t seen you for a couple days! I’m good, how are you? And, do you want your usual?”
“I know, I’ve been busy and broke. But I’m doing alright, just catching up on all of my assignments. And yes please.”
“Oh, that’s good at least! Also we have a new employee that I’m training so it might take a minute to get your order. Is that okay?”
“Yeah of course! Take your time. Thank you!” 
You say, paying the balance of your meal and waiting at the end of the counter to get your food. You see a tall boy with red hair come out from the kitchen. You scoff to yourself as you recognize Yeonjun. ‘Of course he works here,’ you think. It takes him a couple of minutes to make your drink, still new to all the syrups and flavors that are available. As he finishes he calls out your name. 
“Y/N!” 
You walk up to him, remaining polite as you thank him for your order.
“Thank you.”
“Sorry if it took a while, it’s only my third day here.” 
“It’s okay, thank you for the food!” 
He stares at you and you’re about to grab your stuff and walk out, but he stops you.
“Wait, Y/N? Are you taking history 2204? With Professor X?” 
“Yeah?”
You feign ignorance, pretending not to know who he is. 
“Ah, I see. I’m Yeonjun. I think we’re partners for this project. It was nice to meet you.” 
He says as he smiles. You felt a little guilty about your prejudiced dislike towards him. He seemed nice enough, so what if he smokes? And you couldn’t lie to yourself, finding his smile and crinkled eyes cute.
“Oh yeah! It’s nice to meet you too!” 
“Can I give you my number? So we can discuss what days work for us to meet up and work on the project?” 
You nod as you hand him your phone. You watch as he types away his number, smiling as he hands it back to you.
“Thank you, Yeonjun. I’ll text you my schedule and we can figure out what works then.” 
He wished you a good day and you smile, finding his manners charming. 
༄ ༄ ༄
A week had passed since you met Yeonjun at the cafe. You were officially back on track as you submitted the last of your missing assignments the night before, finally being able to focus your time and energy on this project. You had yet to message Yeonjun and you didn’t know why you were nervous to text him. You didn’t want to start off the messages awkwardly so you went with a simple yet forward message to start the conversation.
“Hey! This is Y/N from history class. You gave me your number last week at the cafe.”
You release the breath you were subconsciously holding, hitting ‘send’ and waiting for a response. You didn’t want it to seem like you were glued to your phone, waiting for him to message you back so you bide your time by doing other things around your space. Cleaning up your desk, putting away your clothes, etc. 
You hear your phone go off, waiting a couple minutes to check who the message is from. You groan when it’s just one of your friends asking if you wanted to hang out later. You replied ‘sure,’ and went back to doing anything you could occupy yourself. 
It had been a couple of hours since you messaged him and still no response. Now pissed that he hadn’t yet gotten back to you, you decided to get ready to go out with your friends. There was a party at a bar on campus and you allowed yourself to go out as a reward for completing all your assignments. Putting on some light makeup, you chose a rather revealing outfit despite the winter weather, assuming that it was probably going to be hot in the bar. 
You met your friends there and all started with some drinks. You were talking about your days, just checking up on them. You had all been so busy with midterms coming up that you barely had time to hang out. After having about two more drinks, your friends dragged you onto the floor, dancing to whatever music the band was playing. 
“Y/N!!” 
You hear your name being called and turned around to find the source of the noise. You spot Taehyun and instantly your mood brightens up. 
“Taehyun! I didn’t know you’d be here!” 
“I wasn’t planning on coming but my friend asked me to come with him. I think you’ve met him before, Yeonjun? He’s the one that made your order a week ago.” 
You grimace upon hearing his name. At first, you cut him some slack because he seemed nice enough. You felt guilty about judging him because he smoked. But after not messaging you all day and then hearing that he was at this party, you went back on your word, the idea of disliking him appealing to you again. 
“Oh yeah, I know him. I remember meeting him last week.” 
You say, emotionless. 
“I want you to meet him again. And my other friends too, they’re all cool so I think you’ll like them.” 
You trusted Taehyun so maybe you had to hold off on your hatred a little longer. Though you were good at using your words, your expression and body language always failed you, never being able to hide your negative emotions. 
“These are my friends, Yeonjun, Soobin, Beomgyu and Kai.” 
“Hello, it’s nice to meet you guys, I’m Y/N!” 
“Ah yes, we’ve heard a lot about you. Taehyun told us how you guys were best friends in high school.” 
Soobin said, his tall frame and black hair are easy on the eyes. 
“Yeah, me and Terry go way back! It feels like we met just a year ago but it’s already been 7 years”
You say, laughing. Yeonjun chuckles at your comment, sipping at his beer. 
“It’s nice to formally meet you Y/N. And I like your outfit, it suits you.” 
You stare towards him is cold but your cheeks betray you, heating up at his compliment towards your outfit. 
“Thank you…” 
Your night goes on, hopping between your friend group and Taehyun and his friends. One by one, they all start to leave as you’re left with one of your friends, Taehyun and Yeonjun. You introduce them all to each other and stay at the party for a little longer before deciding to leave. 
“I think I’m going to head back, Y/N. I’m tired and I have classes back to back tomorrow,” 
Your friend says, gathering her things.
“Alright but you can’t walk back by yourself? It’s too dark and you know how dangerous it can be.” 
You look around, trying to find a solution so that your friend doesn’t go back by herself. 
“Taehyun! You live on this side of campus right? Can you walk back with her?”
Taehyun looks to your friend, who’s blushing a little as you try to help her out. 
“Yeah sure but, what about you? You live on the opposite side so what are you gonna do?” 
“I can walk her back. I live around there anyways. It would be no trouble, really.” 
Yeonjun says, smiling as his eyes disappear. You mentally curse yourself for being left with Yeonjun, even though there was nothing else you can do about it. You all nod and go your separate ways, Taehyun with your friend and you with Yeonjun. 
On your walk back to your dorm, Yeonjun fishes a lighter out of his pocket, using it to light the joint that was in his other hand. Taking a drag, you immediately smell the inebriating plant and walk faster. He can sense something off between the two of you, the tension weighing down the atmosphere. 
“Did I do something to upset you? It just… seems like you don’t like me or don’t want me around?” 
You stop in your tracks, having been walking in front of him this entire time and turn around to face him. You exhale loudly before starting:
“First of all, I was not in the best state when the professor announced we were working in random pairs for this project. Not really your fault but then I’m walking behind you as we leave class and you’re smoking! Let alone, the smoke blows into my face and I hate smoking, let alone people who smoke. Then I met you at the cafe and you seemed really nice so I gave you the benefit of the doubt and thought that maybe I judged you too quickly and then I felt guilty. But then this morning, I text you and you left me on delivered all day and then I find you here, at this party and now you’re walking me back to my dorm. So yeah, you can say I’m not really fond of you.” 
You huff, the feeling of letting all of that off your chest almost euphoric. He puts his hand with the joint down next to him, taking his phone and checking his messages, and found that you did in fact text him and he didn’t read it. 
“I’m sorry for not reading your message, I was busy all day and I’m not allowed to use my phone during work. And I do apologize for smoking in front of you, even though it blowing in your face isn’t my fault. But that’s it? I didn’t actually do anything to you, so what’s the judgment for? Why do you hate people who smoke?” 
You didn’t want to stand in the cold any longer, and you didn’t want to have this conversation either. Really, you were avoiding his gaze because you really did have no valid reason to hate him. He never actually did anything to you. But you couldn’t back down now, otherwise you’d be embarrassed. You just huff as you turn on your heel, walking in the direction of your door, the rest of the walk back remaining silent. 
He walks you up to your building. You feel your phone ding, grabbing it from your pocket to check the notification. 
“I sent you my schedule. Let’s get this project done as quickly as we can so we don’t have to see each other again.” 
You hang your head low, guilt hitting you like a truck at the sight of an upset and hurt Yeonjun waiting for you to walk in. Even though you told him that you didn’t like him straight to his face, he still had the courtesy of waiting for you to enter your building so he can say he waited until you were safe to leave. You look back at him one last time, feeling worse than before as you run in and take the stairs up to your room. 
༄ ༄ ༄
You stare at Yeonjun’s schedule that sits in your messages, debating on whether or not you should ask your professor if you could work alone. You’re seriously contemplating it but ultimately decide that you should at least fix whatever you started, as it would be unfair to Yeonjun to leave him to do the project alone, though after your encounter last night, you’re sure he would appreciate not being your partner anymore. 
“Hey. I’m free this weekend if you are to work on the project.”
His reply is almost immediate, like he had been waiting for you to text him back. 
“Yeah, I’m free this weekend as well. Time and place?”
“Would you be comfortable coming over to my dorm at like 12 o’clock tomorrow? I want to apologize for the things I said and the way I acted…”
You bite your lip as you send the message, waiting for the rejection message to pop up.
“Sounds cool. I’ll see you at 12 tmr.”
No rejection? You were utterly surprised at this chance of redemption though, a little taken aback at how nonchalant he sounded. You lived in a single dorm so cleaning up wasn't that bad. You made sure to have plenty of snacks and drinks stocked in your mini fridge and made a little cozy corner for him to work in, while you would sit at your desk. You even made sure to text Taehyun and to ask what Yeonjun’s favorite drink was so you could have it ready for him when he arrived. 
༄ ༄ ༄
You woke up early in the morning, getting ready for the day as you make your way to the cafe to pick up the drinks you had ordered for both yourself and Yeonjun. 
“Hey Taehyun! Do you have those drinks ready for me?”
“Hey! Yeah I do. I have your usual and an iced americano for Yeonjun!”
The boy says, big eyes gleaming as he hands you the drinks. 
“Thank you! I’ll see you later!”
You didn’t tell him about the events that transpired after the party, and from the looks of it Yeonjun hadn't told him anything either. You say your goodbyes and make your way to a little pop-up event on your campus. They were selling cookies and cupcakes to support their club, so you thought it would be a nice gesture to buy you and Yeonjun both a cookie and a cupcake each. 
Struggling to open your door with all the treats in your hands, you manage to get inside of your room and put all your stuff down. You check the time to see that it’s only 11:30 a.m, relieved to see that you still had some time to yourself. 
You hear a knock on your door a little bit later. You had sent Yeonjun the details of your dorm room before he got there but were still startled by the knock. You compose yourself, nervously opening the door to see a blank-faced Yeonjun staring back at you, this time wearing a loose sweater that hangs off his shoulder on one side, gray sweats and black, thick framed glasses. 
“Hey Yeonjun. Come in, I have some things prepared.” 
He nods as he walks in, slipping off his shoes at the little welcome mat you have placed in front of the door. The dorm itself is pretty small, enough for one person but it could still comfortably afford a guest. 
“First of all, I want to start with a verbal apology. I’m sorry for being prejudiced against you based on your smoking habits. And I’m sorry for lashing out on you last night when you asked a valid question. I know it wasn’t your fault that the smoke blew into my face and I guess I was just anxious about this project and texting you that I didn’t even stop to think and consider the fact that you could’ve been busy and didn’t have time to check your phone. Secondly, I asked Taehyun what your favorite drink at the cafe was so I got you an iced americano, and a cookie and cupcake from the fundraiser one of the clubs on campus is having.” 
You shyly hand over the cup with his drink and the snacks that were packed into a little plastic box. He takes the snacks out of your hand and for the first time all week, you relax your shoulders as Yeonjun smiles, accepting your apology and finding it cute in the process. 
“Thank you Y/N. I know you don’t know me and I don’t know what your deal with hating smoking is, but I accept and appreciate the apology nonetheless. Shall we get started?” 
You nod as you instruct him to put his stuff down in the little workspace you created for him, a small throw pillow and fox blanket resting on the inflatable chair you had blown up for him to make use of. He chuckles at the cute setup, settling his stuff down and getting comfy to start working.
༄ ༄ ༄
Throughout your working session, you had some conversation here and there when things got boring or you ran into a particularly difficult part of the project. A couple hours into working you both decide to tap out, noticing the time and finding that you had been working for 6 hours straight. 
“Oh my god, it’s been 6 hours!” 
You say, surprised that you were able to focus on the same assignment for so long though, to your credit, it felt like many different assignments bundled into one. 
“Damn, I didn’t even notice how late it was. That wasn’t so bad actually.” 
Yeonjun says, getting up to stretch his legs, americano and snack box empty as you both refused to leave the room to eat lunch. He picked up his trash, throwing it in the garbage before returning to his corner, looking at you before asking you a question you didn’t think he’d ask:
“Would you ever try it? Smoking I mean?
You stare at him blankly. Your immediate answer was no. Smoking is bad for you, it can cause illness or death. But when you opened your mouth to answer, you didn’t expect this to come out: 
“Maybe one day?” 
You’re speechless yourself at your answer. You were so adamant on hating smoking and never wanting to try it. What about Yeonjun asking you made you change your answer? Was it the way he so confidently stood up to you last night? Or the way he walked you to your dorm despite learning about your true feelings for him at the time? Or the way you wanted him to find you different from the character you first gave off, the one that judged him for smoking in the first place? As if he could see the inner struggle etched onto your face he remarks,
“I thought you hated smoking? What makes you want to try it?” 
Your face heats up at your own silence, but you respond anyway.
“I do hate it. And I actually don’t want to try it. I don't know why I said that. But why do you smoke in the first place?” 
You ask, trying to change the subject to be towards him. Catching onto your little trick, he humors you. 
“It’s a relaxing way to unwind after a stressful day. Sit back, throw on a movie and take a couple hits and you’re there. Relaxed as can be with no other care in the world. You should try it, maybe then you won’t be as tightly wound.” 
You scoff at his little jab at you towards the end of his explanation. You couldn’t lie, with the way he was explaining it to you, the idea of smoking did sound very enticing. But nonetheless, you were willing to stand your ground on this topic, after all, this whole situation you were in with Yeonjun stemmed from your hatred towards smoking and you weren’t going to back down now. 
“As if. And I am not tightly wound, thank you very much. Maybe you can’t tell because you’re brain fried from all the weed you smoke.” 
Thinking your remark has granted you victory in this argument, Yeonjun smirks, offering you a challenge. 
“Try it. Prove me wrong that you won’t feel relaxed. That it won’t make you feel like a weight has been temporarily lifted off of you.” 
He reached down into his bag, pulling out a metal box and setting it on your desk. Upon clicking it open, the smell of weed immediately wafts through the room, filling your nose and causing you to cough slightly. 
“Do you mind not opening that up in my room? We’re not supposed to smoke in the dorms anyways!” 
You said, grabbing air freshener to dilute the smell of the weed. 
“Relax, it's fine. Plus the hall directors on this floor all do it too, so they won’t care.” 
You scoff as he takes a seat, carefully grinding the bud so as not to get any on your desk. He then fiddles with the contraption used to pack the weed into the paper, sealing it off after having packed it fully. 
“I’ll demonstrate how to do it and then you take a hit, okay?” 
You gulp nervously, teetering between the idea of kicking him out or waiting to see how this all plays out. Were you really going to get high because a cute boy challenged you? You’re quickly broken out of your thoughts as you see him flick open the lighter, the smell of burning paper replacing the smell of weed in your nose. He lets it burn for a while, opening your window in the process. 
“When you take a hit, blow out of the window otherwise you’ll set off the fire alarm.” 
You mock a smile as he laughs, bringing the joint up to his lips as he takes a small inhale. You watch as the fibers of the paper burn, the weed contents turning gray. You analyze the way he takes the hit and hold it in his throat for a second before slowly blowing the cloud of smoke out of the window. 
“Your turn.” 
He passes you the joint, as your clammy hands impatiently reach for it. You look at him one more time nervously, bringing the joint up to your mouth and inhaling. You don’t know how fast you ripped it, throat burning and violently coughing as Yeonjun scrambles in your fridge to bring you a bottle of water. You chug the water to stop your coughs, handing the joint back to him as you catch your breath. 
“Nothing about that was relaxing in any way.” 
“That’s because you did it too fast. Look, watch me. You slowly inhale, don’t let the feeling of it in your throat bother you otherwise you’ll start to cough.” 
You hold a little grudge in your stare, cursing at the fact that you were so easily convinced to try the one thing you spited and how your resolve crumbles so easily before your very eyes. You watch him bring the joint up to his lips again, Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat before taking another hit. This time you watch how he holds it in his mouth, counting the seconds before he blows it out. 
“Think you got it this time?”
You take the joint from his hand, silently reassuring him that you’d be fine. You try again, this time slowly inhaling. Remember his words from just a few moments ago, you let the particles settle in your throat for a moment, slightly inhaling before releasing the breath, successfully blowing the smoke out of the window. You look up at Yeonjun with big eyes and a proud smile. 
“I still don’t feel relaxed.” 
“You will in about 3 more hits and 15 minutes.” 
You continue to pass the joint to each other, careful not to rip it too fast or inhale too much. You can feel your eyes start to get a little droopy, a constant smile appearing on your face as you feel your body loosen. You feel slower but not heavy as you turn to Yeonjun and start giggling. 
“I can tell that you’re starting to feel it now. Gonna tell me you don’t feel relaxed?” 
You nod, giggling at his smile. The longer you stare at him, the cuter you think he is. Even in your high state, you couldn’t blame the weed for the attraction you felt for the red-haired man. Maybe you were starting to form a little crush. You think about the sweater he’s wearing, how his neck and collarbone are so perfectly on display, longing to be nipped at. Or the way the glasses make him look more sophisticated and smart, you did like nerdy looking boys. And the way his thick lips wrapped around the joint, eyes following his every move as he takes another drag. You couldn’t help the way you were rubbing your thighs together, the idea of his lips on yours creating a need to form within you. He looks at you, dumbfounded as he himself is now high as well. 
“How are you feeling Y/N? Do you feel good? Do you feel relaxed?” 
This time, you could blame the weed for what you say next:
“I feel great. I would feel even better if you kissed me.”
You laugh at your own comment, finding Yeonjun’s shocked expression priceless and thus further causing you to laugh. You allowed yourself to be bold, not knowing when again you’d have this opportunity. 
“Don’t say things you don’t mean, Y/N. You’re high right now and so am I. Neither of our judgments can be trusted right now.” 
He tries to play the mature, responsible role. He was the one that got you high so he felt responsible for any and all actions made by you or towards you by himself. But the slight, ever-growing tent in his pants was giving him away, revealing that he was not as grounded in his resolve as he wanted to be.
“What? You don’t believe me? Should I prove it to you?”
You take his previous words of challenge and use it against him, playing him at his own game. You walk up to him slowly, eyes red and droopy as you stare into his. You place your hand on his chest, tippy toeing to try to reach up to his lips. 
“Help me out a little?” 
As if all rhyme and reason was thrown out the window, Yeonjun doesn’t hesitate to lean down, capturing your lips with his own. He throws one arm around your waist, the other carefully holding the joint so as not to get any ash over your floor. Your hands remain on his chest as your lips move slowly in sync, breaths heavy from the temporarily shortened capacity of your lungs. You still feel a burn every time you inhale, but it’s worth it for the way Yeonjun has you feeling right now; completely relaxed and carefree. 
He pulls away for a second, grabbing your hand with his free one and placing the joint in between your lips, guiding you to take a hit before he puts it in the metal box with his other weed essentials. His eyes watch you in awe as you close your eyes to take the hit. He pulls you onto his lap as he takes a seat on your desk chair and you happily follow, hands around the nape of his neck as you play with the hairs there. You take your time holding the smoke in and he kisses you again, running his hands along your sides, squeezing as you gasp, letting the smoke out from your mouth into his. He takes the opportunity to gently slip his tongue into your mouth, causing you to moan at the contact, grinding down a bit into his thigh. Your mouth is dry, partly due to the cotton mouth you're experiencing, and partly due to the nerves that had worked their way into your body when you decided to be bold and admit to wanting to kiss him. 
He licks the inside of your mouth before pulling away a little to suck on your tongue, teeth grazing it as he pulls away to trails kisses down your jaw and neck. You’re panting out of breath at his actions, the wetness between your legs only growing as you feel his hard-on press against the side of your thigh. You giggle as he nips a particularly ticklish spot on your neck, the effects of the weed present and causing him to giggle as well. 
“Can I kiss your neck?” 
“Well when you ask so nicely…”
He laughs, pulling away from your neck and tilting his head to the side, granting you permission to mark him up. You lean down, lightly nipping at his milky skin, biting around the area of his collarbones and he rests his hands on your hips, rocking you back and forth on his thigh. Your little whimpers at the contact only turn him on more, hard cock throbbing against his sweats as you eye the clear outline of them. Pulling back to look at your little marks, you’re satisfied as you pull him into your lips once again, this time more hungry. His hands that were settled on your hips move to grab your ass, squeezing as he presses you down harder on his thigh. Your moans are drowned out by his lips as the makeout becomes heavier and messier, saliva escaping from the corner of your lips and dripping down your chin. He pulls away first, admiring your red and puffy lips with a dazed smile. He stands you up, grabbing the joint and taking a big hit, holding it as his hands sweetly caress your face and he gives you another kiss, letting the smoke cascade into your mouth as you try your best to inhale and not choke. He smirks watching the excess smoke slip between your mouths, putting down the remainder of the joint and feeling you up underneath your shirt. 
“No bra?”
“I was in here all day. There was no need for it.”
You respond simply, taking a step back to fully take your shirt off, giggling as you watch his eyes open dramatically at the sight of your bare tits, nipples hardened as a result of the cold air. He pushes you against your desk, leaning you back over it as he takes one of your nipples into his mouth, not even bothering to get you both on the bed. He swirls his tongue around the sensitive bud. You moan at the contact, harshly gripping his hair as he grazed his teeth against them. He takes the chance to slide his hands down the waistband of your pants, settling just above your pussy. 
“Yeonjun…” 
Your whimpers turn him on further as he begins rubbing circles on your clit through your panties and you throw your head back at the sheer amount of pleasure you’re feeling at the moment. He switches his attention from one nipple to the other, trading his fingers up and down your slit, feeling the wetness collect on the fabric separating his fingers from your heat. You don’t realize your grip has gotten impossibly tighter, accidentally pushing his head further into your chest, not that he minded. 
“You’re rough, I like it.” 
He pulls his head away from your chest and you whine at the loss of contact, the warmth his hold brought you being replaced by the cooling of his saliva all over your boobs. He pulls you close enough to him to help you take off your pants and underwear, sitting you back down on your desk as he admires your glistening lips, sliding down both his sweats and his boxers. 
He goes over to his bag and pulls out a condom before rolling it on to his painfully hard erection. 
“You just carry condoms on you at all times?”
“It came in handy, didn’t it?” 
He smirks at your failed attempt at being snarky, grabbing your waist as he slides the head between your folds. Your arms rest on his shoulders, one hand playing with his hair as the other twiddles with the necklace he has on.  
“You tease too much…” 
Yeonjun guides you back and forth on his dick, relishing in the little yet satisfying pleasure he’s giving himself right now. One hand rests on your pelvis, thumb reaching down to circle your clit as you hiss, biting your lip to suppress the moan you desperately want to let out. 
“Please Yeonjun…” 
Your begging only made it harder for him to resist you, slowly bringing the head down to your sopping entrance, groaning as he pushes it past your walls.
“Fuck you’re so tight. Gotta stretch you out on my cock.”
You wince as he pushes himself in deeper, releasing a sigh of content as he fully sheathes himself inside you. He keeps his thumb on your clit, the speed of his actions constant. 
“Y-you can move now…” 
He moves slowly, still letting you adjust before moving at a more constant pace. You’re mindful of the moans pushing past your open lips, finding it hard to contain them as he sets a firm rhythm. You look down beside you and pick up what’s left of the joint. Yeonjun takes note of your actions, holding you steady with both of his hands as you grab the lighter to reignite the substance. You bring it to your lips once again, letting the effect of the weed wash over you, reveling in the heightened effect of the drug. 
You hold the joint up to Yeonjun’s mouth, smiling lazily as he takes a hit, his hips never stopping their relentless pounding into your pussy. He attaches his lips to your neck once again allowing the smoke to escape and you to stabilize yourself while his thumb goes back to circling your clit, this time much faster than before. He also speeds up thrusts, the volume of your moans increasing as his harsh thrusts knock the desk back into the wall over and over again. You’re afraid of the amount of noise you’re making, worried about whether or not your neighbors can hear the scandalous sounds coming from your room, but all worry flies out the window when Yeonjun leans you back, bringing your hips up to a whole new angle for him. 
“Yeonjun!!” 
You scream as his tip hits your spot so deliciously, legs wrapping around him, pulling him that much closer. He chuckles as your face scrunches up, indicative of your close release. He can’t help but to move faster, pistoning his hips at an incredible speed, one that has your eyes rolling to the back of your head as a gush of liquid comes rushing out of you. 
“Yeah that’s it, squirt all over my cock for me. Let it all out…” 
You’re so high that you barely even register the fact that you just squirted all over him, creating a mess on your floor. Your feelings only seem to intensify as the overstimulation kicks in, sensitive walls clenching down on him as your second orgasm approaches you quickly, his fingers still working your clit. 
“I’m… I’m gonna cum again… Y-yeonjun please…” 
Your whines come out broken and sporadic, not sure how much more you can take. 
“Hold on for me a little longer baby, I’m almost there.” 
You nod as you pull his head back down to you, kissing him one last time as he nails his final thrust, hips stilling in you as he feels himself fill the condom. Your pants and sighs fill the now smokey room. 
“I didn’t know you could squirt like that baby girl. You’re so fucking hot”
He carefully pulls out of you, making sure not to let any cum seep out of the condom. You wince as he pulls out, legs feeling like jelly as you release him from your hold. After discarding the condom, he quickly reaches for the napkins you have sitting on top of the fridge, cleaning you up before kneeling on the cold floor to wipe up any remnants of your release. 
“You look good when you’re on your knees,”
You say playfully, biting your lip as you watch him clean your floor. 
“I was right.” 
Your head feels empty and you’re slightly tingly. The high you were having definitely intensified the feeling you were having during sex but it did nothing to help jog your memory. 
“What are you talking about” 
“Have you already forgotten”
You shrug as you jump off the desk, using his shoulder to help ground yourself as your legs recover from their jelly-like state and proceed to put your clothes back on. 
“I told you that smoking would help you feel more relaxed. I guess in your case it also helped you be more bold.” 
Your usual eye roll was replaced by a giggle. 
“Did I really say that? I guess I had no idea what I was talking about?” 
He laughs with you as he finishes cleaning the floor, pulling his pants back on before putting his weed materials away, shirtless. 
You keep staring at him, realizing that you were too high and too needy to notice his toned abs before. 
“I can send you a picture of them if you want? You don’t have to keep staring at me like that.” 
He pulls his sweater over his head to which you pout, upset that your view was now covered. 
“Relax, you’ll see them again the next time we do this.” 
“Next time?” 
You couldn’t say that you hated the feeling of being high, but maybe you weren’t in the right mind to be making decisions like that. 
“Yeah? Next time we work on the project we can get high and do this again. It was fun.” 
He puts his stuff away in his bag, leaving it on your inflatable chair. He wasn’t just gonna leave you after fucking you whilst you were still high. 
“We got a pretty good portion of the project done today. We don’t even have to meet up to finish out individual parts.” 
You say, reminding him about your 6 hour grind to finish as much of the project as you could. 
“What are you trying to say?” 
He says while fixing his glasses and hair in your mirror.
“I’m saying the next time we meet we don’t have to do work.”
He makes eye contact with you through the mirror, his smirk hard to hide at your insinuation.
“You dirty girl. So bold when you’re high, only want me over to have sex.” 
“Well… to have sex and get high! I do enjoy your presence but I’ve never felt so good before. That was like heaven.” 
Even though he didn’t know you that well, he could tell the effects of the weed were still strong on you, watching you yap away, knowing you probably won’t remember this conversation in the morning. He just laughs at your comment as you put your stuff away. 
You watch as he goes back to his seat, moving his bag back to the floor. You walk up to him, sitting down on his lap. You tangle your fingers in his hair, staring at his lips again, which are also swollen. His eyes follow your gaze and he throws his head back in laughter, scaring you a little as you flinch at unexpected sound. 
“You’re still horny?” 
“What makes you say that?”
You play dumb as if you weren’t just drooling over his lips. 
“But we just put our clothes back on!” 
He whines, fixing your position so that you’re properly straddling him. 
“Yeah but, you aren’t gonna reject me right? Not when I’m high and needy because of you?” 
You feign your best soft voice and puppy eyes, trying your best to hold back from laughing in his face at your own antics. Yeonjun takes your face in his hand, giving you a sweet smile.
“No of course not, that would make me a monster.”
He says, pulling you back in for another kiss as you settle in. Maybe smoking a little bit of weed wasn’t so bad after all. 
༄ ༄ ༄
-> Here's a link to all my other masterlists!
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astrolook · 3 months ago
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Retrograde Mercury in the Houses
First of all, Mercury Rx in your birth chart isn't a glitch, it's a feature.
✨ Mercury Rx in Fire Signs (Aries, Leo, Sag) – The Bluetooth connection that works only when they’re standing on one leg, facing north, at precisely 3:33 AM. Loud, passionate, but often misunderstood because they speak before the signal stabilizes.
✨ Mercury Rx in Earth Signs (Taurus, Virgo, Cap) – The software update that takes forever to install, but when it does, it’s flawless. They think before they speak, but people still misinterpret them because they communicate in a slow, calculated way.
✨ Mercury Rx in Air Signs (Gemini, Libra, Aqua) – The Wi-Fi that should be fast but keeps glitching. Their thoughts are rapid, but their words come out jumbled. They rewrite messages a hundred times before sending, yet somehow, they still get left on read.
✨ Mercury Rx in Water Signs (Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces) – The deep web browser that sees things no one else does. Their words are drenched in emotion, layered with hidden meanings. They communicate telepathically (because honestly, explaining themselves in words is exhausting).
Mercury Rx in 1st house - These natives words tumble out of their mouth like a badly loaded webpage. Your brain is fast, but your mouth is buffering and you mispronounce words a lot. This placement natives watches movies with subtitles on even for their own language. Rewatches things just to "get it". Have their own slang. When they type, their autocorrect betrays them. Loves music that feels like a personal soundtrack and listen to songs on repeat. A misunderstood protagonist really.
Mercury Rx in 2nd house - These natives are the slow but steady thinker. Like they pause a lot before speaking, people think they're deep, but they're just trying to remember the word for "fork". Loves slow-burn dramas and hates overly complex sci-fi plots. Listens to the same five artists forever. Loves classic rock, R&B, or jazz—something timeless. Hates overproduced music.
Mercury Rx in 3rd house - Talks fast, stumbles over words, or randomly loses their train of thought. In some cases, they sound sarcastic even if they're serious and don't mean to. Loves multitasking like watches TV while texting, scrolling and half-listening to a podcast. This placement learns vocabulary and phrases through memes, twitter slang, or duolingo threats. Their music taste is genre-fluid. Listens to rap, hyperpop, EDM, and podcasts at the same time. Will pause a song midway to send a text.
Mercury Rx in 4th house - Have an "old soul' way of speaking. Probably sound exactly like their parents/grandparents without even realizing it and some people around them could have told them about it. Writes handwritten letters and doodle in their free time or while in class. Rewatches childhood favorites for comfort. Prefers old movies and refuses to watch a bad remake. Makes a lot of spelling mistakes in their own language. Probably still keep their old notebook and drawings. Obsessed with childhood favs. Loves soft acoustic, old-school pop, or the one song their parents always played.
Mercury Rx in 5th house - The way these natives describe basic things involves cinematic screenplay. Probably wrote a overly detailed fanfic or an unpublished novel. Loves over-the-top dramas, reality TV, or anything with messy plot twists. Probably memorized a whole anime/movie opening before knowing what it meant. If these natives wanna learn a language, it's mostly through songs and movies. Also their inner monologue could be dramatic and sounds like Shakespeare. In music, listens to anything that makes the natives feel like the main character.
Mercury Rx in 6th house - Damn. Don't ask these natives "How are you?". They will give you a full detailed report. Talks and writes in bullet points. These natives watches informative or detailed YouTube videos like restoration videos, primitive survival, science documentaries "for relaxation". Lo-fi beats, instrumental music, or podcasts instead of songs. Prefers music that helps them focus.
Mercury Rx in 7th house - These natives adapts their way of speaking based on who they’re talking to. Also could convince anyone they have the same interests. Into arts and crafts. Loves romcoms and dialogue-heavy movies. Also psychoanalyze people a bit too much. Loves duets, soft indie, or romantic sad songs. Will make a playlist for every relationship they’ve ever had.
Mercury Rx in 8th house - These natives are cryptic texters and speakers. They speak in riddles. This placement makes the native to hide their true opinions and make them say things they don't really want to due to fear of criticism or being labeled a misogynist. Sometimes convey their true opinions in the most cryptic way possible. Watches crime documentaries and loves dark, psychological themes. Listens to dark, moody, or hauntingly beautiful. Think Lana Del Rey, The Weeknd, retro songs or anything with eerie instrumentals.
Mercury Rx in 9th house - These natives are really good at giving TED talks and for writing long-winded essays, even in casual texts. Uses "however", "anyways" in DMs. Loves to watch travel vlogs, historical dramas, other language movies and likes philosophical anime/movies. Loves music with deep lyrics and listens to songs in different languages.
Mercury Rx in 10th house - These natives have a sense of professionalism even when they order food. A level of sophistication. These people uses proper punctuation in texts and draft emails for hours before sending. Loves business dramas. Watches TED talks and political speeches. These people probably has a certification related to their career. Listens to motivational rap or music that makes them feel productive.
Mercury Rx in 11th house - Their speech is 50% memes and 50% conspiracy theories. Writes in lower case letters. Uses 'lmao' and 'lol' to soften every message. Watches niche web series, obscure YouTube channels, and indie films. Their vocabulary comes from internet slang and discord convos. Not into mainstream pop.
Mercury Rx in 12th house - These people say something vague, a week later, it would turn out to be weirdly accurate. Their journal entries would look like prophecies, their vivid dreams and psychic visions. Loves watching horror, surreal, experimental films. Loves songs that makes them forget their own life and dream about themselves in that song.
✨🔮DM me for a complete astrology reading & check out my pinned post for pricing! ✨🔮
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lsunstreakerl · 1 month ago
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SUNNY. MAX DEVELOPS SOFTWARE FOR F2/F3 SIM. I WILL NEED A CURRENT UNIVERSE FICLET OR SMTH FROM YOU PLEASE. SUNNY R U LISTENING.
okay I know absolutely jack shit about how sim development works and I hate BS'ing in my work, so hopefully this isn't too incorrect! if someone knows better than me, please feel free to infodump about it :)
"Mate, that is way better than when I was in F2."
Kimi squeaks as George's voice startles him, running low over a kerb as his teeth rattle in his head.
"Mate."
"Sorry! I was going to say that Toto wants to do lunch with us— didn't mean to scare you."
He definitely did. Kimi is learning that George is just as prone to jokes and hazing as the other drivers, the only difference being that he's polite about it. Mostly.
Kimi swings out of the sim, stretching his legs with a low groan.
"You can take it for a spin if you are missing it so much."
George snorts, arms folded across his chest. His hair is loose, falling across his forehead, and he's just in a hoodie and shorts— Kimi has seen him more casually in the factory in the past few weeks than he'd seen in the media ever. It makes him feel more human, even if part of him still feels untouchable.
"Yeah, I can't imagine it's improved much."
Kimi shrugs, hugging one knee to his chest to stretch his hips, wobbling slightly on his one leg.
"I liked it— it helps with learning the smaller differences and all that."
George raises an eyebrow, checking his watch before shrugging and stepping into the sim.
"Watch the door and tell me if someone's coming by, so I can blame it on you."
Kimi rolls his eyes, dutifully stepping backwards to be able to view the hallway as he pulls out his phone.
Kimi: george is trying the f2 sim
Ollie: LOL
Ollie: WHY
Kimi: he doesn't believe it's better than when he used it
Kimi: which is stupid
Kimi: of course it's better
Kimi: he's just old
Ollie: don't let him hear you say that
Ollie: the botox mercedes curse is real
Kimi: if he comes in with filler I will tell Toto to set up his retirement account
Ollie: and then put in a good word for me?
Kimi: you are earmarked as a ferrari sacrifice already mate
Kimi: don't even bother
Ollie: I'll fix them
Ollie: just you wait
"Kimi, what the hell are they feeding the dev drivers?"
George sounds incredulous as he takes a corner.
"Why is it so good?"
Kimi laughs, tucking his phone in his pocket.
"I should be asking you, honestly. I am not sure how there is enough time in a formula one schedule to do sim work for us, but it is very nice."
"Huh?"
George takes a corner too sharp in a move that would've sent Kimi into the wall, but he manages to recover it, lips pressed together in concentration for a moment before relaxing again. Kimi feels the envy like a physical beast in his chest, the same way he does every time he's reminded how much further he has to go.
He's always careful to be perfectly ready in the mornings, to have his employee badge clearly visible, but George shows up in casual clothes and an easy confidence, knows all the team members by name, has Susie's coffee order memorized— it all feels unattainable to him. He's not sure how he'll ever match up, and finds himself wondering if it will always be obvious to everyone, if he's always going to look like a kid trying to wear his older brothers shoes.
Still, George had sounded genuinely confused.
"Well... I know Max does a lot of the work, but surely the rest of you do sometimes also? It cannot all be him?"
George goes into the wall, twisting to look at Kimi.
"Verstappen? Wait, no— don't tell me. That's exactly who you mean."
Kimi nods.
"Kimi, I am going to be very serious with you."
George swings out of the sim, stepping forward and putting his hands Kimi's shoulders.
"That man is not normal. Please, please do not use him as your metric for normal people, because he's a freak of nature."
Kimi opens his mouth to try and defend him, but George presses his palm over his face.
"Nope, don't hit me with the hero worship, I don't want to hear it. He's unnatural, okay? Like a freaky racing robot that sometimes glitches and talks about cats instead. He has extra hours in the day and eyes in the back of his head."
Kimi quirks an eyebrow. George sounds fondly exasperated, like Max being inhuman is something he's begrudgingly gotten over. George pauses, and then his eyes look at Kimi, extremely serious.
"And I need you to be a prodigy and come into the team early, because otherwise Toto might actually manage to drag him over here, and I would rather shunt into the barriers full speed then have to be teammates with him, got it? I am counting on you."
Kimi nods, trying not to laugh. Max isn't scary, he's actually very nice— he's always happy to chat on discord and share setup tips, and he'd promised Kimi he was only a garage or phone call away if he needed something. He's much kinder than Kimi had expected the current world champion to be.
George lets his hand fall away, ruffling Kimi's hair.
"Okay, move it, Toto got catering and if we're late all the good sandwiches will be gone."
He steps out of the room, head swiveling both directions to make sure his stint in the sim hadn't been noticed, before walking confidently down the hallway.
Kimi follows dutifully behind.
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ovaryacted · 2 months ago
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Even though I know it’s all intentional, I truly hate how we’ve become forced to normalize AI. I do think that the manufacturing of Artificial Intelligence was not done with malicious intent and has the capabilities of actually doing good, but time and time again ai is being used in literally everything for the worst reasons and getting its getting harder to escape.
From AI being used to scrape people’s hard work all over the internet, to giving predators and abusers more power in fabricating porn of strangers, to being used to strengthen racial bias in surveillance technology and aid in the development of weapons of war and mass destruction against marginalized groups of people…it’s just too fucking much. It’s so exhausting wanting to live in a world where we just didn’t need or have any of this shit, and it wasn’t like this a few years ago either. But now you can’t step outside without seeing something about AI, or a promotional ad for a new system to install. You can’t engage online anywhere without coming across AI software, and literally every single device in our present day implements AI to some degree, and it’s so fucking annoying.
I don’t want to keep worrying about the next idiot that’s spoon feeding my work into their AI system because they lack humanity and imagination. I don’t want to have to manually turn off AI detection on all of my apps and my phone just to use something. I shouldn’t have to be more mindful about the media I consume to distinguish whether or not it’s original or just more AI slop. I know it’s all intentional since we live in a hyper-capitalist world that cares more about profit margins & rapid productivity. But I really do vehemently hate how artificial intelligence has become such a fundamental aspect of our day to day lives when all it does is make the general population dumber and less capable of thinking for themselves.
Sincerely fuck AI. And if you use AI, I really do suggest you read up on how the data centers built to manage these AI systems suck up all of our resources for a simple prompt input. Who cares about answering a question in ChatGPT, entire communities don’t have water because they’re too busy cooling down the servers where people ask what 6 + 10 is cause their brains are so fried they can’t fire a single fucking neuron.
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xzaddyzanakinx · 1 year ago
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Not That Kind of Guy
Part Fourteen: Stalker!Anakin Skywalker × femme reader series
Warnings: stalking, weirdo behavior, psychotic/delusional behavior, possessive/protective, sexism/misogyny, sexual content/fantasizing, pervy behavior, panty/scent kink, mask kink(Ghostface), gaslighting/manipulation, public/semi-public, spitting, cumplay, nude vids/pics, masturbation, oral, PIV, dick piercing, forced orgasm, bondage/blindfolds, biting/slapping/spanking/cutting, rape kink, NONCON/DUBCON/CNC, Somno, blood, knife, gun play, GEN. SMUT [all possible tags, not necessarily all apply]
Info: Ghost is whiny, He’s feeling petty, he told you so!![diary entries from Ani] extremely not proofread. Stalker!Anakin Character art (as Ghost) MDNI 18+
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Diary Entry: September 2nd
I lied. I said I wasn’t mad at you, but I am.
It’s not like I tell you no to anything, so why wouldn’t you just ask me first? Are you just desperate for a moment away from me and too nice to tell me that? Running from your problems won’t help especially when your problem is me.
I did what I should’ve done a long time ago. A new software has been installed on your phone, very similar to the screen cloning software linked to my laptop. Only this one is active all the time, a constant feed of live audio that I’ve taken the liberty of flagging a few words within the code.
Anakin, hate, love, Ghost, annoying, angry… so on and so forth.
The software flagged several sections of audio within the timeframe of your drive to the cabin. I must say, I’m surprised about the things the two of you talk about, I’m never going to be able to look Han in the eye ever again.
I also lied to you about something else. I don’t work tonight, or tomorrow. I switched up my schedule with April for you, cause I have a little something planned for you. A little thing I’ve had tucked away, actually never intended on getting it out and doing anything with it really. It was a gift from Cliegg after there was a murder on the college campus last year.
Don’t worry, it wasn’t me that time.
Anyway, I think it might be fun. For me at least.
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“Okay but I don’t get it.” Luke said, propping up his feet on the dash while you drove.
“What about it don’t you get?” You snorted, slowing to a stop at a traffic light. “I think it’s pretty self explanatory Luke.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t come equipped with a cooter and I’ve never, nor wanted, the opportunity to see one.” He crossed his arms and tilted his head back and rolled his shoulders. “I just don’t see the benefit.”
“First of all, it’s pretty.” Holding a finger up and adding a second, “second, it feels heavenly.”
“I am a gay man.” Luke scoffed, “Dicks aren’t very pretty. A little jewelry can’t fix that.”
“How does it even work? Does he have to take it out to piss? That’s inconvenient.”
“No!” You laughed, covering your mouth as you turned the dial to quiet the radio. “No, he doesn’t have to take it out. To answer your other question, it’s the metal balls on either end of the jewelry. That’s the point of the piercing you know? It rubs up-“
“Okay that’s enough, thoughts have been thunk.” He covered his ears and did a dramatic shiver of disgust.
“You asked!”
“I didn’t know you’d be so descriptive!”
“You described in great detail all about the massive ingrown hair on-“
“Oh my god! I told you never to mention that again!” Luke reached across the console and whacked you up the back of the head.
“I’m driving!” You squealed, your hand shooting out to the side and shoving his shoulder. “No, don’t you dare touch that radio! For fucks sake if that’s-“
“It’s ABBA.”
“Go to hell.”
————————————————————————
After two hours you reached the small lakeside cabin that was to be your home for the weekend. A cute little place with a loft and two small bedrooms. The kitchen was… lackluster; a fridge and a stove with a whopping number of three cabinets. The living room however did have a pool table, which in Luke’s eyes made up for the fact that your sister beat him to claiming the loft room, because she’d driven separately and arrived before you.
You chose the room to the left of the living room and Luke chose the one on the right. The view from your window was beautiful deep forest green, leaves and moss and huge tree trunks. While Luke’s was the deep blueish green lake water, the occasional white wake following a boat zipping past.
After tossing your bag onto the floor in the general direction of the nightstand you jumped onto the squishy and super cheap springy mattress on the tacky ‘rustic’ log bed. Pulling up Anakin’s contact you tapped the call button and listen to it ring on speakerphone.
“Hey pretty baby.” Anakin’s rich timbre flooded the line.
“Hi Ani.” You smiled despite him not being able to see you. “Just got into the cabin and picked my room.”
“Oh you got to pick?” He said curiously, “you got the loft didn’t you?” You could hear his grin.
“No, my sister did.” You scoffed, “I thought Luke would have a cow over it but he decided the pool table here would offset his disappointment.”
“Pool table hmm?” Anakin tsk’d.
“Hot tub too.” You grinned.
“A fuckin’-“ he groaned and let out a loud huff, “a hot tub?”
“Yes sir.”
“Hmph.” He snorted, “someone finally taught you some manners huh?”
“W-what?” You asked nervously, bringing the phone closer to you and hopping off the bed to shut the door. “Manners?”
“You just called me Sir didn’t you?” He laughed. “Been taking some etiquette classes?”
“Oh shut up.” You breathed out a sigh, a breath you’d almost choked on. Your guilty conscience was really beginning to steam roll your daily life, even on your mini-vacay you can’t escape your wrongdoings. Ghost was still haunting you all the way out here.
“Just teasing doll.” He snickered, “Anyway, what’s on your agenda?”
“Nothing for tonight, probably gonna sit on the dock and have some drinks, do a little bonfire, hot tub maybe.” You told him, beginning to relax again.
“Drinks? Be careful baby. It’s not exactly safe to drink and get into a hot tub.” He chided, “I’m serious.”
“I know.” You sighed, rolling your eyes.
“Good girl.” He said, pleased enough with your response. “So what room did you say?”
“Oh! I didn’t actually oops. I got the one looking out into the woods, it’s real pretty, I’ll send you a picture after we hang up.” You said, shifting your weight to sit more comfortably.
“Aw thanks babydoll.” You could hear his little smile through his words. “Well, I should probably let you get back to it huh?” He sighed.
“If you wanna talk more-“
“I always wanna talk more but I don’t want to keep you from your fun.” He said a bit quieter. “Uh, just don’t forget to call and leave me a message before bed okay baby? I’d love to hear your pretty voice when I get off work tonight.”
“Okay Ani,” nodding even though he couldn’t see you. “I’ll talk to you soon then… I miss you.”
“I love you too.” He made a kissy noise and hung up quickly, leaving you with a frustrated, pinched brow that you reached up to sooth with the heel of your palm.
After snapping a quick picture of your view through the bedroom window, you rejoined your trio in the living room where Luke was teaching your sister to play pool. You stood and watched for a moment, seeing them bicker like they were just reminded you of how much you loved summer trips with them.
Growing up with a sister close in age to you was fun, except for when it wasn’t. She went to school before you did, made friends before you did. Of course you were only two grades behind, but there is a big difference between kindergarten and 2nd grade. She had always been happy to play with you until then.
So when she was meant to be paying attention to you, or at least making sure you were alive, while you were both outside… she was busy on the swing set in your backyard. Which is how you found yourself with scraped knees and (surely, most definitely) a broken ankle from your scooter.
A new family had moved in across the street from you not too long before the summer started, you hadn’t met them, didn’t even know they had kids, until you were being pecked on the shoulder by another child’s finger. After that, Luke was found wherever you were; glued at the hip was an understatement, your families were convinced you were soulmates, that you’d grow up to be married.
Jokes on them.
His sister Leia was outgoing and confident in ways that Luke lacked, so during that first summer she gravitated toward your sister. The twins became a binder, something that held the four of you together. Bridging the gap perfectly between kindergarten and 2nd grade as 1st graders.
It stayed that way, for the rest of your school years and after.
Your parents got along swimmingly, the four of you floated between the two houses. Nights often ending up with a pair of kids asleep in the floor, where one of those children did not belong. A quick phone call to the house across the street to make sure your sibling was there, then all was well and your parents would scoop Luke and you up and tuck you in.
You were seven the first summer your parents had the grand idea to spend a week on the lake. It was a tearful goodbye, kids who spent every possible waking moment with each other are not easily pried apart.
Your parents drove the full two hours to a cute lake house they’d found online and within the first 30 minutes of being there your father had enough of the sniffles and whines. By dinner time Luke, Leia and their parents were sitting around fire pit with you.
Thus your annual tradition was born and kept even after the horrid aftermath of Luke’s unexpected outing. Sans parents of course. Your father supported your mother even if his views didn’t fully align with hers. He was a ‘be gay, just don’t be gay in front of me’ type of person, while your mother was more of the ‘send him to conversion camp, he’s tainting my children’ type of gal.
That didn’t really jive with the whole ‘love and positivity’ approach that the twins parents had about the situation. Which leaves you where you are now, reminiscing on those happy childhood memories before everything got complicated, before you discovered the world outside of your safety net, before the consistent visits from your uninvited house guest.
A loud clap broke you out of the fog and suddenly you were hyper aware of your sister’s nose right in front of your face.
“Lauren!” You gasped, your eyes wide before softening into a grin.
“You’ve been staring into oblivion for a solid minute,” she giggled, “I thought about sticking my finger in your mouth but I was afraid you’d bite it off.”
“My mouth?” You asked confusedly.
“Yeah you’ve been catching flies, looking like a mouth breather.”
“Eew! Don’t call me that!” You scoffed, standing up and following her over to the pool table to discuss your evening plans.
——————————————————————————
Anakin watched your little blue dot travel back and forth from the cabin to the dock, he listened the chatter between the three of you as he drove the two hours out to the pine forest your weekend getaway was taking place. The mile long gravel driveway was perfect to stash his car off to the side of, no one would be coming in or out of the drive all weekend.
He walked through the woods, backpack slung over his shoulder, his hood up and mask on. It was 9:57 and the three of you were still on the dock. He could hear you talking about getting into the hot tub through the Bluetooth earbud he had in, that new software was really paying off.
He hadn’t planned to do this next bit, but he couldn’t help himself. He purposefully got his left shoe dirty, twisting his foot side to side in order even dirt for a proper footprint. Then he left his mark on the first step up to the front porch.
*ping*
‘Having fun?’
You laughed, picking up your phone and leaning back in your chair as you crossed one leg over the other and switched the sound off. You’d only had it on for when Anakin texted, and now he was. Or you thought he was until you realized the text came from your own number.
‘No. Don’t engage. He’s not going to know where you are, how could he possibly know?’ You thought to yourself. ‘I planned this in person, I told Anakin at his place not mine. All Ghost knows is that you’ve left for the weekend.’
You swiped the message away and let out a huff, deciding to take the opportunity to walk back up to the house and call your boyfriend.
“Guys I’m going up to the cabin, gonna call Ani.” You said, standing up and taking your hard lemonade with you. “Need anything?”
“Nope, we’re about ready to head back anyway.” Lauren answered, waving you off. “We’ll be up soon.”
With that you walked away, taking the worn dirt path back up to the house and dialed Anakin’s number, waiting for the voicemail to pick up your call.
‘Hey Ani.’ You smiled, crossing one arm across your chest to rest your other elbow on while you talked. ‘I’m probably not going to bed just yet, but I am going back up to the house. I just wanted to fill you in a little bit I guess.’
Once your shoes hit the gravel you absentmindedly kicked a larger rock off to the side, swinging out your leg and shifting your position to walk backwards, looking down at your sister and Luke on the dock.
‘We’ve been just hanging out all evening, made some sandwiches and had drinks by the water.’ You pivoted again as you neared the porch and looked down to ensure your footing before taking the first step up. ‘We’re going hiking tomorrow morn-‘
You scrunched up your face and took another look before backing away from the steps completely, your eyes scanned the porch and saw the cabin door was still shut.
‘Sorry, thought I saw something…’ you muttered into the phone, spinning slowly in a full circle to take a better look at the tree line. ‘I- okay, anyway. Going hiking tomorrow… probably swim too. There’s a canoe moored down there so maybe we’ll try that out.’
Off to the left of you behind your sisters car you swore you heard gravel crunching underfoot, but when you looked toward the dock, Luke and Lauren where still sitting there. You marched over to the opposite side and saw nothing, going so far as to look under her car and yours.
‘Okay well…’ You were certain now that someone was outside and you were not alone, your phone buzzed against you ear and you pulled it away to swipe away the message, not even registering the sender before holding your phone back up to your ear.
‘Uh alright well I’ll talk to you in the morning,’ you quickly walked back over to the porch steps and side eyed the footprint as if you’d expected it to disappear by now. ‘Goodni-‘
A strange feeling passed over you, the hairs on the back of your neck stood up and a chill ran down your spine like a drip of cold water. You were almost afraid to turn around.
‘I gotta go, Miss you bunches… goodnight.’ In your panicked state you didn’t have the same thought process you normally would, you’d simply ended the call and whipped your head around, expecting to find someone, something, that might’ve caused that hair-raising fear. There was nothing.
Breathing a sigh of relief you laughed at yourself. It had probably just been a rabbit, maybe you’d startled it and it kicked up some gravel. The footprint… it could have been there when you arrived, it could’ve been made by one of your group, including you.
You checked the message you’d swiped away and your blood ran colder than ice. Your rational explanations were bulldozed in seconds.
A picture of you, standing in the drive way, taken from behind your sisters car.
The breath was stolen from your lungs. Your sight was locked into tunnel vision, all you could see was the front door as you ran to it and pushed it open. Colliding with something solid and warm as you stepped inside.
Something living and breathing that gripped your hair and cradled you to its chest, something that kicked the front door shut and pressed a cold, blunt object to the temple of your head.
Something that made you want to scream.
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Diary Entry: September 2nd continued
I have time to kill and nothing to do while I wait for you. So I figured I’d write alittle bit.
I’m currently sitting under a tree, watching you and your cute little ponytail swishing around while you giggle. You’re so beautiful. Everything you do is beautiful. I’ve never seen something as exquisite as you.
Maybe that’s part of the reason I want to ruin you so bad. Leading you, my innocent doe, down the path of corruption could quite possibly be my life’s work. How would you like that sweetheart?
You wanna be my magnum opus?
Though of course we do have the one small identity issue to take care of. I need to get my shit together and figure out what the fuck I’m going to do. It’s not like I can tippity tap it into Google: ‘how to tell my girlfriend I’ve been stalking her for almost a year’.
No thank you. I don’t trust WikiHow with the fate of my love life.
Let’s be for real. I don’t even trust myself with the fate of my love life because I’ve already managed to fuck shit up. I’m continuing to fuck shit up. What I’m about to do? It’ll fuck the fuck out of the shit.
What can I say other than love makes people do crazy things?
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“Ghost.” Your voice was wobbly and unsure. “Is that a-“
“Gun? Absolutely.” He grunted, pressing the barrel into your skull.
“What are you doing? They’re gonna be back soon, you can’t be here!”
“I came to chat.” He said simply, leaning his head down to put the cheek of his mask against your warm skin. “I missed you.”
“Did you miss me? Is that why you left your boyfriend back home? Wanted to let me have you all to myself for a weekend?”
“No!” You snapped at him, twisting your head away from his.
“Heard you on the phone.” He cooed, “still can’t say the L word? Why’s that?”
“If Luke sees you… my sister- they’ll call the cops, you know that.” You pushed against his chest and felt it rumble with a low laugh beneath your palms.
“Stop deflecting, answer my question.”
“I told you I wasn’t going to talk about Anakin with you!” The whisper left your lips tainted in unease.
“I’m aware. That’s why we aren’t talking about it. You’re going to tell me.” He barked, holding you close to his chest and walking backwards toward your chosen bedroom.
“N-no, I won’t. That’s not fair.”
“It’s not fair?” He scoffed. “I don’t care if you think it’s unfair.”
“How did you find me?!” You wriggled from his arms the moment he closed the bedroom door.
“I know everything about you baby.” His voice low and much too confident for you to believe anything otherwise. He looked relaxed in the way that he reached behind himself and locked the door, leaning back on it and crossing his arms, one long leather finger running parallel to the barrel of the pistol.
“I just wanted one weekend!” You shouted taking off your sneaker and throwing it at him, he gave you no reaction and it only pissed you off more. “Just one!”
“One weekend away from you! I know you can see everything on my phone, you see and hear everything I do, why do you think I wasn’t the one planning this trip? I didn’t want you showing up here!” Yelling at him in a way you never had before as you stalked toward him with your other shoe pointed at him. “I don’t want to talk about Anakin with you! I don’t want to tell you how I feel!”
“Do you want to know how I feel?” He asked calmly.
“I don’t give a shit!” You chucked the shoe at him and he batted it away easily.
“I think you do.” The gun raised up to his mask as if he were scratching his forehead with the barrel. “I think you care a lot and that’s why you won’t tell me.”
You didn’t answer, because he was right. You did care and you did care a lot. You’d been avoiding telling Anakin you loved him to spare Ghost the hurt of having to hear you say it to someone else.
“No.” You stuttered, hesitating and hating the taste of the word on your tongue.
“Don’t lie to me.” He barked, holding out the pistol and motioning for you to move. “Kneel. Now.”
“Gods, seriously? Put your arms down, you idiot.” He scoffed as he watched you lift your hands and put them behind your head like you were being arrested as you knelt down slowly.
“Well I’m sorry. I’ve never been held at gunpoint before.” You snapped, scowling up at him.
“I’m so lucky to have to honor of being your first then.” He grumbled, tucking it into the back of the waistband of his jeans while pulling the pink silk from his pocket and tossing it at you.
“What the fuck are you looking at?” His voice gruff as the toe of his shoe tapped your knee. “Put it on.”
Ghost shook his head, undoing his belt buckle, the tail end of the leather now forever imprinted with your teeth marks. You did as you were told and heard his pants unzip along with a soft grunt.
“How many fingers am I holding up?” He asked, holding his flat palm out to the side to make sure you couldn’t see, rearing back to slap you.
“How should I kn-“ *smack* “ow?! What the fuck?”
“Just making sure.” He snickered, taking off his gloves and putting them in his hoodie pocket.
“Asshole.” You mumbled.
“What was that?” He asked with a playful tone. “You want me to fuck your asshole? Is that what you said?”
“Shut up. You know that’s not what I said.” You muttered, unable to keep your lip from curving upward just a fraction of a centimeter.
“Ah well, the offer still stands.” He chuckled, tapping the side of your jaw with the cold metal barrel of his pistol.
“You’re making me nervous waving it around like that.” You huffed, jerking away from it.
“Good.” He snorted, “open your mouth.”
You did exactly that, thinking you’d feel the warm weighty head of his cock hit the tip of your tongue. Hoping for a taste of the salty precum that wept from his cockhead. You weren’t expecting something small, cold, metallic and pellet shaped.
“Don’t swallow; this is the only time you’ll ever hear me say that so you better listen.” You could hear his smarmy grin. “Roll it around, you feel that?”
“Mhm.” You nodded, feeling the smooth metal and the grooves carved into it, opening your mouth again and he plucked it off the tip of your tongue.
“Your initials, or well… what your initials should be.” He mumbled the last bit.
You hear a series of mechanical and metallic noises, followed by the unmistakable sound of a firearm cocking back.
“You did not just-“
“I did.” He snickered, holding the gun sideways and pointing it directly in the center of your forehead. The blunt edge digging into your flesh and pressing down against your skull.
“Spread your fingers.”
“Why?” You asked as you splayed your hand.
“Do you have to question everything?” You felt thick metal circle your middle and ring finger, dropping to the base of each digit, barely making any contact with your skin on its descent. It really put in perspective just how much bigger than you he was.
Even more so when you felt his warm, calloused fingertips weave their way between yours and squeeze gently. The tender gesture did nothing to quench the fear sitting heavy on your chest. A loaded gun, a loaded and ready to fire gun was about an inch from your brain.
“C’mon, you don’t want to talk? Not even like this?” Condescension dripping from his lips. “Loaded gun to your head and you still won’t talk about your feelings.” He tsk’d.
“It’s not your business.”
“See that’s where you’re wrong. We’ve already had this discussion haven’t we?” He crouched down in front of you, air rushing past from the quick motion. “It is my business. You were mine first.”
The curved edge of the barrel traveled down your forehead, across your cheek and rested heavily on your bottom lip.
“Give it a kiss for good luck little doe.” Ghost spoke low and steady, almost monotone. Considering your situation you did as you were told once again.
“Good girl.” He stood back up and pushed the waistband of his boxers down by hooking his thumb beneath the elastic. “Now get to work, bitch.”
His tone had changed again, now a sharp and hard edge that smacked you like a cold wind. Emotional whiplash was to be expected in every encounter you had with Ghost, but none so far was as bruising as this.
He’d never brought a gun to a knife fight before.
You hesitated for a moment longer than he was willing to wait, so he dropped your hand, the small bit of comfort he’d allowed you to have. Grabbing the back of your head and forcing his swollen cockhead past your lips, cool metal returning to the center of your forehead.
You gagged and spluttered around his length, the hot and leaky cockhead bruising the back of your throat. Ghost seemed to love the sound, loved feeling you cough and try to gasp for air, his hand tightened in your hair as he let out a loud and gravely moan.
“You suck cock so much better with your life on the line.” He laughed, pulling you away from him and releasing your hair. He watched you cough and wipe drool off your chin and neck with the back of your hand.
“Ready to talk?” He asked, his breathing heavy and uneven.
“Fuck you.” Spitting the words out with venom.
“Sorry sweetheart that’s not on the agenda tonight.” You felt the rush of air before his palm made contact with your cheek, your hand immediately lifting to cradle it and feel the heat radiating from the irritated flesh.
“C’mon doe, I don’t have to be mean about this.” He barked, “Just use your big girl words.”
“L-Luke’s gonna be back up here any minute.” You stuttered, lifting your head in the general vicinity of where his would be.
“You realize you’re only making this more difficult for yourself right?” He asked, not giving you the opportunity to answer when he fisted your hair and forced your lips to meet the tip of the barrel of his pistol.
*shk* *click* **click** nothing.
Before you had time to process the fact that he had just pulled the trigger of a loaded gun in your mouth, you were being choked and not given any hope for breathing. His forefinger and thumb tightly clamped over your nose and his cock lodged in your throat as he fucked your face. Instinctively you tried to draw in a breath, accidentally breathing in saliva, making you cough so hard that Ghost had no choice but to back off.
“Ghost...” You dry heaved on your hands and knees. “I’m n-not gonna tell you.”
“What’s it gonna take huh?” He asked angrily, you could hear the sound of clothes rustling just before he lifted you up and shoved you over toward the bed. “What’s it gonna take for you to admit that you love me?”
“I don’t!” You yelled, taking off the blindfold and tossing it aside.
“I didn’t say you could take that off.” He snapped at you while pulling his gloves on, snatching the ring off your middle finger and shoving it down in his pocket. He whipped his head around toward the door suddenly.
“Shit.” He shoved the gun in the back of his waist band and grabbed his bag without explanation.
“What?” You asked sitting up on the bed.
“Gotta go.” He grumbled.
He grabbed the blindfold and slipped it back over your head, grabbing your jaw and tilting your head back, his lips met yours in a soft embrace. His tongue piercing gliding across the slit between your lips before pushing past them slowly, the taste of cigarettes and gum flooded your senses. He hadn’t tasted like this last time he kissed you.
He took one of your wrists in a gentle grip and brought it to his cheek. Ghost kept a loose grip on your wrist but he allowed you to feel the smooth skin beneath his eyes, your fingertips collecting the smallest amount of moisture in the outer corner of his eye.
He was crying.
He broke the kiss, your lips begging to stay connected to his. As much as you hated to admit it to yourself that kiss felt like home. The fact that he was shedding tears was unsettling, the car crash that was this relationship had officially gone beyond whiplash and into ‘trapped inside, in need of the jaws of life’ territory.
He took the same hand and pressed it to the center of his chest and left it there to put both his gloved hands on either side of your face, pressing his lips to your forehead. Their warmth left your skin and you immediately wanted it back.
He took the blindfold back off and smoothed out your hair quickly, putting the silk in his pocket and putting up his hood. The mask back where it belonged, those black pits where his eyes should be held an emotion that was pouring from every inch of his being. You felt like he was staring through you and straight into your soul. He stood beside the window with his bag slung over his shoulder. Who knew such strong emotion could be felt… seen, without ever laying eyes on the person emitting those feelings.
“Lock your window back.” He nodded toward you and promptly climbed out just as you heard the front door opening, he was gone before you even had a chance to get a second look as he ran off.
You did as he asked and locked the window before checking your appearance in the mirror, a mess was reflected back at you. You looked as if you’d been lost at sea. Tangled hair and ashen skin covered in streaked makeup. The churning in your stomach only rocked the proverbial boat more.
After a deep breath you brushed your hair and pulled the makeup wipes from your bag to clean up with.
“Hey!” You heard a sharp knock on the bedroom door and answered it while still wiping away at your face.
“What’s up?” You asked your sister as she pushed past you.
“Just checking on you before I went to bed, Lukey and I were out there for longer than we meant to be.” She shrugged on her way to jump on the bed, “Ow! Fuck.” She winced and picked up her bare foot, rubbing the sole with her thumb as she picked up the offending item.
“Who’s ring?” She asked, holding it up for you to see.
“Oh it’s just Anakin’s!” You lied, laughing anxiously and plucked it from her fingers, encasing it in your own hand. “Probably just fell out of my bag.”
“He has such a weird taste in jewelry. What even is that?” She pointed to your closed fist, and watched as you peeled back your fingers and exposed your palm.
It wasn’t a lie, it was Anakin’s.
“A centipede.” You swallowed, staring at the hunk of metal. “It- he always wears this one. I don’t… I’m not sure how it ended up in my bag.”
Your throat felt dry, your palms started to sweat. You felt like you might be sick. Why did he have Anakin’s ring? He hardly ever takes it off.
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Diary Entry: September 3rd
I should have never taken those fucking rings off. I had to lie to you. It’s stupid I know but lying about something little like that is almost worse than the big secret you know? Cause I don’t want you to think I’m untrustworthy, I am. I’m very trustworthy.
You just let me shoot what you thought was a loaded gun in your mouth. I’d say that means you trust me quite a bit. Ghost, not me I mean. You trust Ghost with your life, but you can’t trust Anakin enough to tell him you love him?
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Date
September 3rd (1:45 am)
Anakin jogged to the end of the driveway and hopped into the front seat of his car, taking off his mask and gloves. With the steering wheel in both hands he leaned forward to rest his forehead on the back of his hands. Keeping his grip at the top of the wheel with one hand he leaned back again, looking up at the roof of his car, his other hand going to pinch the bridge of his nose as he squeezed his eyes shut tightly.
He nearly jumped out of his skin when his phone started ringing, he quieted himself and quickly strategized a set of half truths and full lies that he might need to use before answering the phone.
“Hey princess.” He sounded cheery as he picked up the phone, “lucky you, I was just going out to smoke.”
“Oh?” You asked, feeling relieved to hear that he sounded fine. Maybe ghost didn’t chop off his finger after all. “Sorry, I- I have a weird question.”
“I love weird questions.” He snorted, you could hear him flip open his zippo lighter and snap it shut after a long inhale.
“Are you missing any rings?” You asked, hoping he said no and that this was just a very odd coincidence.
You heard rustling on the other end of the line while Anakin frantically searched his pockets, coming up one ring short.
“Yeah I am actually, why?” He answered clearing his throat nervously.
“Which one?”
“My many legged lad.” He answered, instinctively flicking his cigarette ash with anxiety, the miniature embers floating down to his jeans. He quickly swiped them away and tried to remain focused. “I took it off to shower at your place last night.”
“I figured the cat knocked it off the sink or something.” He shrugged to himself, hoping it was enough of a lie to convince you that maybe Ghost snatched it off the sink.
“S-somehow it ended up in um, my bag I guess.” You said, turning the jewelry over in your palm, placing it on the nightstand beside the bed.
“Huh, well that’s fucking weird.” He chuckled, “I don’t know, babe. Just keep it safe for me til you get back I guess sweetheart.”
“I will, I’ve got it on the nightstand right now.” You answered, licking your bottom lip.
“Thanks babydoll, listen, I gotta go back inside.” He grumbled, sucking air through his teeth the way he always did on his last drag of his cigarette. “I love you doll. Sleep good.”
“Night Ani, text me when you’re home.”
“You got it baby." Anakin answered, his voice low and smooth.
A perfectly normal conversation. A perfectly normal explanation on his part. A completely plausible assumption that Ghost simply took it from Anakin. Though you’d never known him to be brazen enough to come around with Anakin there and awake.
A perfectly dreadful whisper floated in one ear and out the other.
—————-
Date
September 3rd (2:27 am)
Anakin walked circles around his car, desperate to find an escape, an excuse, an explanation. Something, anything to help him backtrack. He couldn’t go back to your cabin tonight. He’d made you lock the windows and he knew Luke would quadruple check that the front door was locked. He didn’t know your sister or Luke’s sleep habits so he didn’t feel comfortable picking the lock.
He would have to tough it out until tomorrow night.
You were very much in the same boat as him. Waiting anxiously to see if he would come back, to see what would happen.
You wanted to call Anakin again, just to hear his voice, to listen to the calming comfort of it. To affirm that all was well, he was safe and fine. That was the only reason. You just wanted to make sure he was safe. Anakin was perfectly capable of handling himself, but to your knowledge he didn’t own any weapons that he could defend himself with. As far as you knew, Anakin Skywalker was sweet and kind and soft. He was loving and gentle. He was the perfect man, the most wonderful thing to walk into your life.
Anakin loves you and you love him. You love him so much, so much that it hurts. You love him so much that you’ve refused to say it. To protect him, to protect yourself, to protect Ghost from the hurt of it.
That’s just it though, there is Ghost. He’s there at every corner, he’s the creak in the floor boards at night, he’s the figure you see in the corner of your eye, he’s the creepy feeling of being watched, the voice you swear you hear saying your name.
He cares for you, and he cares deeply. You know without having to hear it from him that he believes you’ve hung the sun and the moon, he knows all the stars in the galaxy twinkle just for you and he believes you should be treated as such.
For all his wrong doings he’s done something right, not the helpful little things nor the occasional softness he’s begun to show.
No it’s something else.
It’s a feeling so oddly tangible that you can feel it in your throat each time you swallow. There isn’t a name for it, no term that you’ve ever heard could properly define it. You know that much to be true.
It’s a pull, a strong and undeniable tether. Like a child and their security blanket. Visible or not, where there is one there is always the other.
You’d miss him if he were gone, much like you’d miss the comfort of a fresh from the dryer blanket. The fuzzy warmth that wraps you up so tightly, the feeling of being tucked away from the world in safety.
That heat fades quickly, just like he does. He’s present one moment and the next he’s left you alone and you have to start the cycle all over again. You stare at your reflection and watch the world tumble around you and he watches you from behind the glass until he’s ready to come out again.
You want to fold him up and lay him across the end of your bed. Within reach at all times, you don’t want the dryer door between you anymore. You don’t want the few moments of heat from the fabric.
You want consistency.
Anakin can give you consistency in a way that no one else ever has. You never have to worry about him leaving or being disloyal, you never have to voice your feelings or opinions if you don’t want to because he just knows. You never have to worry about anything. Except for Ghost.
With Ghost you know that you are without a doubt the safest person alive. You don’t have to think, you can just be and know he is there to do anything and everything for you. You never have to worry about anything. Except for Anakin.
————-
Date
September 3rd
Hiking had never been your favorite summertime activity, but you’d come to realize it wasn’t because of all the walking or the bugs, it wasn’t even because of the horrid, atrocious memory of the time you’d walked through poison ivy.
You didn’t like it because it gave you too much time to think. That was exactly the opposite of what you needed right now. Right now you needed nothing, you needed the cold emptiness that comes along with burying yourself in something that took up all your brain power until there was none left to dwell on your troubles.
By the time you’d reached your destination you were drenched with sweat in the most uncomfortable way imaginable. Your shirt stuck to you, the cups of your bra were damp and itchy, your shorts had ridden up and you weren’t entirely sure that you were wearing shoes instead of walking barefoot in a bog.
“Luke.” You grumbled, taking a long drink from your water bottle. “How long have we been out here?”
“About two hours.” He replied casually, not nearly as winded as you and your sister. “Let’s eat and we’ll head back.”
“Are we lucky enough to be on one of those trails that the start is long but the loop around is short?” Your sister asked, wiping her forehead with the inside of the collar of her shirt.
“You’re both wimps,” he scoffed and rolled his eyes, passing out sandwiches and chips. “No, the way back is the way we came.”
“You’re joking.” You complained with a scrunched up expression.
“No ma’am.” Luke responded and thumbed over his shoulder at the overlook you’d made the journey to see. Yes it was beautiful, but worth the blister forming on the back of your ankle? Definitely not.
“Unless you’d like to take a dip off the cliff edge.” He snickered, knowing damn well that you’d rather gnaw off your fingers than jump from this height. “It’d be a couple minutes swim to shore and you’d be at the cabin.”
“No way really?” You said, standing up and biting into your sandwich as you walked cautiously closer to the edge. Gazing down you saw the dock, your eyes traveling up the tiny- hardly visible- dirt path until you reached the cabin.
He was right, you tracked your hiking trail up the curve of the incline you’d suffered through, it was a massive arc. Leaving you staring at the comfort of the cabin, so close but impossibly far away. You looked for a moment more, the lake sparkling like glitter in the bright sunshine. A few boats disrupting the water as they sped past, far off the shore.
You snapped a few pictures and scrolled through them, nearly choking on your food as you spotted something you’d missed with your naked eye. Only seeing it now that you were scrutinizing the photos quality to decide which one you’d keep.
“Jesus, you alright?” Lauren asked, watching you thump the side of your fist against your chest. Breathing heavily through your nose while chewing the food to swallow it and chase it down with a gulp of water.
“M’fine.” You coughed, looking back down at your phone and then to the landscape below to see if he was still there.
You should’ve expected to find him, expected the way he made himself at home on the porch, rocking in a rocking chair. The scene was still jarring, even more so when you realized he wasn’t wearing his hoodie.
His bare arms on display, his chest and abdomen covering by a loose black tank top. You frantically tried to zoom in with your camera. But of course all you could see was a fuzzy blur of inked skin.
What luck.
He was there, in broad daylight without a staple piece of his ensemble, one he didn’t remove in front of you. Now you understood why he told you he’d be recognizable if you were to see his skin. He was covered in tattoos.
And it’s your unfortunate luck that despite being so close to him, it’d take an hour to get there. Your great luck that he’d left himself vulnerable to your gaze at a distance that would prove impossible to decipher his identity. He was doing this purposely, there was no doubt about it. Why else would he do something so risky?
Ghost was baiting you.
Like the stupid little fish you were, you nibbled on the hook until he was able to reel you in.
‘I see you’ You texted him,
‘Creep.’ He texted back, standing up from his rocking chair and walking to the front porch steps. He waved dramatically, the sun shining down on him and catching on the white plastic of his mask, making him plainly visible. You watched through the zoomed in and grainy image of your phone as he moved, hoping maybe it would clear up and you could see something identifying.
Suddenly you were reminded of something you’d learned in school, a book you’d read… maybe Nancy Drew? Signaling using a mirror or something reflective to catch a person’s attention, sometimes used as a means of communication in Morse code. Though this wasn’t nearly as sophisticated.
He had pulled out both his knives and flipped them, the sunlight refracting off the shiny silver blades erratically until it became one concentrated beam as he crossed the sharp edges over each other. Forming an X to direct to light straight at your face, promptly blinding you.
“Fuck.” You winced, stumbling backwards and causing your sister to gasp.
“Christ, what the hell are you doing?” She asked worriedly, standing up and walking toward you but not daring to move as close to the cliffs edge as you were.
“A- a bug or something.” You lied, rubbing your eyes to clear up the imprinted flash of light you saw each time you let your eyelids fall shut.
*ping*
‘See me now?’
‘Asshole.’ You mumbled under breath, looking back over the cliffs edge to see that he’d managed to get out of sight in the time it took for you to recover.
“Alright, let’s go back. I’m hot and sweaty.” Luke said, standing up and stretching. He packed away our trash and then shoved Lauren forward when she complained.
“I’ll push you off the edge if you don’t shut up and leave me be.” He snorted, dodging her water bottle that she swung by the handle at him.
“C’mon let’s go before you kill each other.” You said with a laugh, feeling better now that Ghost was -probably- gone for now.
After another hour of hiking back down the steep incline you’d just traveled up, you were grateful to collapse on the cold wood floor of the living room and bask in the cool air supplied by the window unit nearby.
——————————————————————————
Diary Entry: September 3rd
I’m so jittery waiting around for you guys to get the hell out of that stupid cabin. I have shit to do and you’re gumming up the works. I need to get your bathing suits, I scouted out around the lake last night when I couldn’t sleep. Not in my Ghost mask, I used a bandana. I think it’d be real unfortunate to get the cops called because Ghostface is roaming the pine woods.
Anyway, your bathing suits. I’m taking the ones I disapprove of. Did you know there’s a cabin full of jockey college boys right across the lake from you? You better not have planned that. They have a perfect view of the dock you’ll be swimming off of. Which means they were probably watching you last night when you were having your drinks.
I’m the only one who can watch you like that. Especially when you’re gonna be prancing around with that fucking ass of yours on display. ‘Ani, I’m just gonna wear it to tan in!’ Yeah alright. That’s the only reason doll? That’s the reason you brought a thong bikini to the lake? With a cabin full of testosterone waiting to catch a whiff of you from across the way?
I can’t believe you’re so stupid sometimes. I love you but damn do you have no self awareness? I’d let you wear it when I’m around. But I’m not. Not the way I want to be at least. I want to be there fucking you with my eyes and smacking your cute ass every chance I get. If I’m not standing there watching over you then those idiots might get the idea you’re wearing that shit for them and not me.
They don’t know you’re tanning, making that bangin’ fucking body sun kissed for my viewing pleasure when you return. They just see ass and tits and drool. I might drool yeah… but it’s only for you. I love you. I have eyes only for you and I always will.
Those dick-wads don’t know you or care about you. They lust over every bitch they see. You don’t want to make it easier for them do you? No? That’s what I thought. I know you didn’t do it purposely little doe. You can’t help it. You’re used to me being by your side and keeping you safe, used to wearing whatever you want when I’m around because you know I’ll fuck shit up if someone looks at you wrong. You’ve gotten used to it and didn’t use your little girl brain to make adjustments for the fact that Anakin wouldn’t be there for you.
Just another reason you should’ve brought me along.
🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤
Oh my fucking god it’s so fucking hot outside. What the hell is wrong with Luke? Making you walk up that MOUNTAIN. I totally would’ve followed but I’m actually busy trying not to fucking drown in my own sweat. There’s a bunch of reasons Ghost is mostly nocturnal. This is one of them.
I was being baked alive.
Anywho, I showered and now I smell like you, so I’m gonna wander about, have a wee little snack. By the way, I’m really sad you forgot the mustard.
🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤
Baby, don’t be mad I didn’t mean to almost make you trip. I just thought it would be a little funny. I was right. But I’m still kind of sorry.
I wish I could’ve seen your face.
‘Oh my god! His shoulders are out!’ Scandalous.
Risky? Yes. Worth it. Yes, can’t wait to hear you whine about it when I fuck you again.
——————-
Date
September 3rd
“Okay, let’s get ready for the lake.” Luke stood up and clapped his hands together once, a loud *pop* resounding through the living room.
“Already on it.” You huffed, throwing yourself forward into a sitting position and hopping to your feet.
You entered your room and noticed two things immediately: 1) the ring is gone 2) your red one piece swimsuit is on the bed. Upon further investigation you discovered a note laying on top of it.
Written in quick scratch was a short note from Ghost.
‘Doe,
I’ve taken the liberty of making adjustments to your wardrobe.‘
‘Adjustments?’ You thought, grabbing your bag and dumping it out on the bed.
The only things missing were your other bathing suits and your shower stuff, quickly grabbing the red suit you rushed to the bathroom and locked yourself in to change. Pushing back the shower curtain you saw your body wash and shampoo, the walls still wet from his shower. You couldn’t help but let out an annoyed huff.
Your phone vibrated on the side of the small bathroom sink, sliding across the porcelain and falling into the sink basin. You quickly fixed the straps of your bathing suit and retrieved your phone before the leaky tap could wet the screen.
A video message awaited you from ghost, the image from the thumbnail made you laugh in a choked kind of surprise. He was outside giving you a leather thumbs up, your hot pink string bikini on overtop of his black hoodie. As you pressed play the video was mostly silent other than the nature noises of the background until he flipped the camera around and zoomed in.
A low modified whistle left his lips as his camera focused on the bathroom window, your bare back in the frame for a moment before he shifted the camera slightly to get the mirror in front of you, showcasing your breasts as you changed into your swimsuit.
You swiftly spun around going to the window to scan the area, he couldn’t have possibly gotten too far away. Throwing open the window you stuck your head out and looked to the left and then to the right where Ghost had suddenly appeared, inches from your face.
“Ow! Fuck, agh-“ You yelped, whacking your head on the window pane while he laughed at your expense.
“Hey! You okay?” Luke banged yelled from the other side of the bathroom door.
“Y-yeah!” You shouted back, turning to look inside the bathroom again before turning back around to see Ghost had crouched down, out of view if you were to open the bathroom door.
“What are you doing? You’re takin’ ages.”
“Uh- sorry. Wardrobe difficulties.” You squeaked out, glancing back at ghost who was still wearing your hot bikini bikini top, sans bottoms… which was honestly a bit disappointing. You heard Luke walk off, yelling to your sister that you were probably ‘on the throne’.
“Who is he? The Queen?” Ghost’s mechanical voice came from beneath the mask.
“Close enough.” You shrugged your shoulders and watched as he stood up to his full height, his knees cracking upon the ascent.
“Why did you take my shit Ghost? I wanted to wear that!” Whisper shouting at him while you hung the upper half of your body out the window.
“That’s why I took it.” He said plainly. “I don’t want you looking like a fucking slut out there without me around to keep other eyes off you.”
“Who the hell is gonna see me out here!? You shouldn’t have even seen me out here!” You pointed angrily.
“Shut up, I know you’re happy I’m here.” He snarled, getting right in your face, reaching up to grab your chin. “I heard you last night.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You scoffed as if you hadn’t done exactly what he was insinuating.
“I don’t want the girl who moans for me to be ogled at by some fucking frat guys.” He barked, shaking your chin and digging in his leather fingers.
You turned bright pink. You couldn’t argue with his statement. You did moan for him. Under him, over him, even without him.
“What frat guys?” You stuttered, avoiding acknowledgement to the first half of his sentence.
“Across the lake.” He pointed, flicking out his knife to gesture in their direction. “Big group of ‘em. Paid them a visit last night just to check things out, you know I worry about you.” He said in a quieter tone, bringing the blade of his knife to your bottom lip and tapping it with the flat side.
“I would’ve never known they were there if you hadn’t told me.” You narrowed your eyes, speaking carefully as the knife rested against your lip.
“Maybe.” He shrugged. “Or maybe not.”
“What’s that supposed- shit, why?” You flinched and brought your hand to your mouth touching the nick he’d left when he quickly jerked the knife away.
“So you’ll think of me when you’re yapping to some no-count bitch boy from across the way.” He snapped back. His leathered thumb came up to spread the blood across your bottom lip and past it onto your tongue.
“It’s just a bonus that you bleed so fucking pretty.” He pushed your tongue down with his thumb, rubbing the crimson liquid into the squishy muscle, then curling the same thumb behind your bottom row of teeth and shifting his cock in his jeans with his free hand.
“Clean it for me baby?” His modified voice lower than usual.
“No, use your mouth doe.” He chuckled when you reached out to grab the knife from him to rinse in the sink.
“What?” You furrowed your eyebrows but opened your mouth anyway. He placed the blade on your tongue and nodded at you.
“Now suck it.” He grumbled, affectionately patting your cheek twice before using two fingers to push up your chin and close your mouth around the cool steel.
————————————————————————
“What happened?” You sister asked, touching the scabbed line that traveled up your ass cheek and disappeared beneath your swimsuit.
“Well, I just fell.” You muttered, pulling the hem line to cover more of it. “Don’t really know what cut me but it happened a little bit ago.”
“You need to be more careful.” She shook her head, finishing up her job of rubbing in your sun tan lotion. “I swear you’re worse than my toddler.”
“Oh shut up, I am not.” You scoffed, “there’s a difference between something you don’t have any control over and choosing to shove a pebble up your nose.”
“I- that was only one time! When will you let that go?” She asked grumpily. “What am I supposed to do, carry around a fucking periscope so I can see behind me?”
“I’m not- I was kidding.” You sighed, shoving her out in front of you, making her stumble.
You clicked the lotion shut and shook it up, slamming it down on the heel of your hand before putting a generous amount in your palm. You slapped it onto her back and rubbed it in, ignoring the hissing sound she made when the wet glob of sunscreen in your palm smacked her flesh and splattered messily across her skin.
“Caleb is just… an explorer.” Lauren said, trying to make it sound better than it was.
“I never shoved anything up my nose.” Luke chimed in from behind his sunglasses, sitting up against one of the dock posts. “Lauren, you know I was an ‘explorer’.”
“No. You were a bug boy.” You snorted, looking over at him with a little smirk.
“So what? I liked… like bugs. They’re cool okay?” He grumbled waving them off.
“Remember when you had Ants on a Log with actual ants?” You giggled, Lauren crouching down as she let out a guffaw.
“I was seven!” He said defensively, crossing his arms.
“Caleb is two. He can shove a pebble up his nose and it can be excused.” Lauren snorted, catching her breath. “You were seven, you knew better. You have no room to talk.”
“Okay mom,” Luke huffed, you knew without a doubt that he was rolling his eyes behind those glasses. “At least I don’t still pick my nose.”
“Hey! Sometimes you just gotta get up in there.” Lauren pointed at him, a scowl on her face. “Don’t lie, you pick your nose. Everybody does!”
“Uh… I mean I technically pick my nose. Just with a tissue.” You said, supporting your sister in your useless argument.
“So you’re both gross then.” Luke gagged and grabbed his stomach dramatically.
“If I’m gross, so are you.” You said, getting settled on your towel. “Lauren’s right. Everyone picks their nose.”
“You’re both horrible.” He grumbled, shaking his head before standing up and lowering himself into an inner-tube so that he could float on the water.
You all had a peaceful first half of your day, it was refreshing after the hike to relax in the sunshine, letting the heat lull you into a state of calm and the opportunity to think of nothing save for the concentration of singling out different nature noises just because you could. Cicadas, the occasional grunt of a bullfrog, Whippoorwills calling out to each other in the trees, the gentling lapping of the lake against the dock.
None of the city sounds that clouded your head and made it feel cluttered.
It was cleansing, a nice reset for your mental state. Exactly what you needed, exactly what you were so happy to be here for. Now if only you could get some clarity on the difficulty you’d return to after your weekend of being at ease.
Even in peace times nothing is perfect.
The gentleness of the world you’d drifted into was being infiltrated. The distant sounds of a boat zipping through the water at much higher speed that it should’ve, especially with the water skier attached to the towline. What could make it worse? Two jet skis flanked the boat at a good distance away, though it was clear they were all in one group. Shouting and laughing like drunken fools, which you were sure they were considering the way they were behaving.
You licked your bottom lip, reminded of the small nick Ghost had left you with. These must be the ‘no-count bitch boys’ he was referring to earlier. You had to admit, he was definitely right about that. Wrong about your willingness to speak with them though.
You huffed and stood up, deciding now would be a good time to take a refreshing break in the water. The liquid enveloped your skin, the heat of the sun having beat down on you had your flesh soaking up the warmth so much that the water felt cold. In involuntary shiver tickled your spine as you swam over to Luke where he’d floated a way from the dock.
Slowly but surely the boat along with its entourage weaved its way across the water to your side of the lake, you pushed Luke’s inner-tube back toward the dock to give -them- yourself some space.
“Thanks babe.” Luke said, dipping his hand into the water and flicking it at your face.
“Hey! I was trying to be nice!” You scowled, reflexively sliding your hands beneath the tube to dump Luke out of it.
“I could’ve drowned!” He gasped as he resurfaced, taking off his sunglasses so he could wipe the water from his face and shake out his hair.
“Oh whatever, don’t be whiny.” You grinned.
“Me? You’re telling me not to whine?” Luke tossed his glasses up onto the dock and made his way toward you quickly. “All I did was flick you with water and you tried to drown me!”
“I did not!” Squealing as he lifted you up and tossed you farther into the water. How such a scrawny little guy could do such a thing was beyond you, but you had no time to contemplate.
You only had time for revenge. Squinting beneath the murky waters you made your way to Luke, hearing him call out your name in garbled syllables.
Ever since you’d known Luke, he’s had an irrational fear of the tiny possibility that there may be an alligator in any body of water. Didn’t matter how far from the wetlands of the states you were. There was always a slim chance, to him at least.
Holiday Inn pool? ‘But it’s outside, it could’ve crawled in! Will you just check it?’
Tiny dollar-store-bought blow up pool in your backyard? ‘But the creek! The creek’s back there… I’m not going in till you do.’
It got to the point that it was so severe his dad had to come up with a ‘gator gauge’ which was really just a hand-held tennis ball launcher he’d spray painted green and put a ‘gator free’ sticker on the back of so he could prove it was safe. Top-notch, high security, military grade ‘gator gauge’ that doubled as the lazy way to play fetch with their dog.
It was mean. Maybe a bit cruel… but he deserved it. So you swam behind him and put the heels of your palms together, spreading your fingers and creating jaws. You’d disappear from sight for long enough that a hypothetical alligator could’ve dragged you off and you heard Luke call out for you again.
Your lungs started to burn and you knew it was time to enact your plan. Luke stood on his tiptoes in the water, the perfect opportunity to press your fingers and nails into the muscle of his flexed calf. He screamed and thrashed about, you let him go and backed up so you could resurface. You popped up and sucked in a deep breath that turned into a choked laughing fit.
“You little bitch!” He yelled, splashing as he swam at you, pushing you under the water by your shoulders. He quickly pulled you back up and shoved your shoulder. A pink tint to his cheeks from embarrassment, he huffed and splashed a wave of water at you.
“I could’ve drowned!” You mocked him, pretending to cough.
In your short time of distraction the boat and its occupants had cut the engine and let the momentum carry them closer. The jet skis now tethered to the back, the ladder down in the water. Despite the safer option a group of five guys jumped over the side and made themselves at home in your space.
“Hey! How are you ladies?” One of them asked, completely ignoring that Luke was right there with you.
“No soliciting, thanks.” Your sister popped her head up and shook her left hand to show off her wedding ring.
“Whoa, didn’t mean anything like that!” He laughed and his friends agreed. “Just wanted to say hello, see if you guys were up for a drink.”
“I think we’re just fine.” Luke spoke up from behind you.
“I wasn’t asking you.”
“Alright, let’s go.” Sighing you turned around and swam until you were able to touch the lake bottom, walking the rest of the way to the shore.
“Hope you’re going to get some mixers.” A different guy shouted.
“Going to get a restraining order if you don’t leave.” You shot back over your shoulder, earning a round of laughs from them, the opposite of what you’d hoped for.
“C’mon. Don’t be like that! Just give us a chance. We’re good people.”
“Good at ruining my day.” Luke mumbled, following behind me and scooping up his stuff and getting ready to leave.
“You’re going? Serious?” One of them laughed.
“You came over here uninvited, you’re not entitled to our company.” You said, turning around and walking toward the house.
“That may be true but you’ve certainly made up for it by jiggling that ass.” His friends snickered and one smacked his arm.
You reminded yourself that you were here to have fun. Not to argue with a man who has half the brain capacity of a drunk squirrel.
Deciding you couldn’t let them win, you figured you’d beat them in your own way. You continued on without another word, pretending you hadn’t heard them, instead pulling out your phone and sending a simple text message.
‘You were right.’
The answer was an immediate: ‘I know.’
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Diary entry: September 3rd
I hate to say I told you so. But I will.
I. Told. You. So.
I was having a great time watching you, it was reminiscent of how I used to watch you have dinner and I’d eat with you. You’re so cute and playful… I love you so much. I know that Luke is super gay, that’s not why I’m jealous. I’m not worried about that. I’m not stupid and I’m not paranoid, I know better. I’m jealous because it should’ve been me that you were playing around with.
I’m jealous cause you didn’t invite me. I’m jealous that you got to swim and I’m sitting in a tree, soaking my shirt with sweat. I’m jealous that Luke had a beer. I’m jealous that your sister took a nap. I’m jealous that those shit-for-brains tried to talk to you. (I love your sisters fucking comeback though.)
I’m jealous that they got a better look at your sweet little ass than I did too.
I’m pleased that you were so off-put by their behavior that you texted me little doe. What a very good girl you can be, but, oh so good at being bad too. You’re just like me. Maybe I’m making it worse, maybe better. I don’t know, I don’t really care either.
I’m just excited.
My little doe is feeding that flame of deviancy hanging out deep within your stomach. I knew you had it in there somewhere, gods you’re just so fucking perfect. I’ve never felt more lucky. ‘Ghost, I’ve got one more day here. What if they come back?’
What if indeed.
Men can be unpredictable. A woman is safer in a pit of snakes that being alone with a man she doesn’t know. Which is why I try so desperately to protect you especially in situations like this. That delivery guy? He seemed harmless. But I dug a bit deeper and well, he wasn’t so harmless after all.
Now, these boys might be disgusting pigs who prefer to wallow in the squalor and bask in the glory of their custom made beer can wall. They don’t deserve anything too harsh. Also; Wow. It’s amazing how they’ve managed to drink that much and none of them have been hospitalized for alcohol poisoning. But back to business, I personally don’t feel like killing anyone. I know for a fact you don’t. I also know that even if I did feel like it, I couldn’t because you’d definitely know it was me. Then what the hell would I do?
You had no good ideas. Which is not your fault, you just can’t think about these things on your own. You need guidance and that’s what I’m here for. So, I settled on something you’ve never done, I haven’t done in a long time, and it’s not technically illegal here… just heavily frowned upon. I hate their shit attitudes, they’re gross and they’ve disrespected you and that’s unacceptable. So a nice little bit of property ‘destruction’ is in order. Middle school memories, how sweet.
TP the cabin? Absolutely. Destroy their beer can wall? Definitely. Silly string their vehicles? Duh.
Fuck you before and after? Yes. Always.
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Part Fifteen
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Tag-List:
@wickedtactics @tsugumiholic @kingdomhate @burnthecheshirewitch @exquisitcorpse @arzua10 @bby-imasociopath @depressed-kay @aliciaasky @naty-1001 @mrsmikaelsxn @bunnylovesani @ausskywalker @angelsadmired @slut4starwars @chocolatepalacecloudhoagie @starkiller419 @hearts4mitski4 @lethargic @allhailbuckybarnes-blog @shadowhuntyi @mortalheartache @fallinlovewithevil @sythethecarrot @chaoticantihero r @vadersslut @luvvfromme @anakinsbaee @sweetcheesecakesblog @luvskywxlker @angelsadmired @kaminokatie @anakin-pilled @graveyard-stray @chiaraanatra @jediavengers @zapernz @lunalitva @salted-snailz @queenofchaos99 @ellie-luvsfics @dazednstars141 @hopesworlld @lonaah @guiltycherries @syralix @doblasftcisco @demieyesore @hemmoxloser
Thanks to @rottencandyblood and all their love❤️
THE TAGS LIST IS FULL! But if you want to be tagged I will comment ur username for you. Love you all so many.
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mr-gallows · 7 months ago
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James Sunderland Headcanons/Analysis! (SFW) Stuff about his job, dad, music, tidbits
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These are based on Remake James! It's a little easier to come up with headcanons for remake James, since he's a bit more expressive here than the OG. Job:
James is an office clerk (this is confirmed canon), which means he has a job revolving around paying attention to detail. He keeps track of financial records, transactions, orders, supplies, and various other things that an office needs to run smoothly. He's messy, but he's good at his job and has a careful eye for detail. It makes sense for him since he's able to notice small things in Silent Hill that help him progress.
James is well-versed in using office software and spreadsheets, and sometimes is tasked with doing minor trouble-shooting for coworkers. James has an ongoing battle with a faulty office printer.
James prefers this kind of work, even if it doesn't exactly fill him with joy. He's definitely an introvert, but doesn't mind helping others if needed.
James does NOT participate in casual Friday. He always wears his button-down shirt and tie. Prefers not to get too casual about work; he likes to keep those spheres separate. Dad:
James sold his car to help with medical bills that weren't covered by his insurance. His father gave him his old 1977 Pontiac Ventura for free. It's the car his dad drove when he was growing up.
The car barely ran and James taught himself how to fix it. It was his only distraction from Mary's illness.
James has a strained relationship with his father, because he's just super weird. He's caught his dad saying and doing strange things, for instance, holding the box with Walter Sullivan's umbilical cord and just staring at it. One night, James came home from hanging out with his friends, and saw his dad in the kitchen, holding up a knife and staring at the wall as if in a trance. James was freaked out and decided to just come back home in the morning.
This might be dumb and random but I feel like Frank Sunderland doesn't have the best hygiene and his apartment smells. James is probably used to gross stuff. He doesn't like it, but he can deal with it.
James's mom left because she couldn't handle being around Frank anymore. James ended up growing up through his teen years with just his dad. Music:
James strikes me as the kind of guy who listens to The Police, Hall & Oates, maybe REM. Enjoys music with prominent bass lines. He probably listens mainly to hits from different bands as well.
Tends to prefer light rock. Metal isn't really his thing.
James's guilty pleasures are Duran Duran and Cocteau Twins.
I have his shuffle here!:
Tidbits:
James doesn't seem to laugh much, but he does have a sense of humor somewhere in there. Usually it's pretty dry and sarcastic. He appreciates observational humor.
Mary was fond of puns. He always pretended to hate them and roll his eyes, but would end up smiling or chuckling anyway.
James isn't much of a sweets guy, but his favorite ice cream flavor is vanilla. His favorite soda is Coke. He liked Coke floats as a kid. Favorite dessert is apple pie.
Drinks his coffee black.
Tried to tend to Mary's garden when she was sick, but he was overwhelmed by it and being unable to regrow the plants just made him feel worse. He didn't have her green thumb.
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minimoll7 · 7 months ago
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Ugh I literally cannot find anything on google. I just want to enjoy a simple game without all of these annoying issues suddenly popping up because of windows updating of all things. And I don't have a lot of time either!! I'm leaving soonish and I'll probably be gone for a while so I really wanted to relax a little bit but I guess not x(
Google is just telling me what save states are or how to fix memory card issues. Or just showing me results for different emulators altogether
All I want to know is why I can load a save state but can't actually save a new state!! F1 isn't working and save stating manually by going into the program itself isn't working!!! There's always a small little skip in the game when I save state, its not doing that. Its a clear indication that its not working
But *why?* Why is it not working?? The folders are there and as far as I'm concerned they are fine. Nothing in the video settings seem off. The only thing I can think of is going to my external hard drive and copying that version of the program onto here. If its settings related, then maybe that could fix it as I've never messed with the settings until that annoying full screen issue came along
I just hope this works because its just. I get stressed out way to easily and I know its stupid. But its not like I really have anyone to teach me this stuff. Like I kind of do but one person is constantly busy and prioritizes himself above all else, so getting him to help can be a huge pain in of itself. And the other person knows less overall and is less likely to be able to help (tho I definitely appreciate his willingness to try and also his patience). Its just. ugh. Updates ruins everything
Wow okay so windows update messed with my PS1 emulator, specifically with how it looks when full screened. Since then tho, there's been 2 more updates and now that full screen issue is fixed
But now save states aren't working. For reference, I'm using ePSXe. Anyways, loading a save state works just fine. But it won't actually save state anymore
Google isn't helping because everyone's issues are different from mine or google can't seem to understand what I'm actually looking for. This is genuinely so frustrating
#i guess just to be clear when i speak ill of updates#i don't really mean video game updates#for the most part those are always good#or at least neutral#but updates with literally anything else? they annoy me#i get that there IS a genuine purpose to them like i do completely understand that#its just annoying and they rarely ever change or add anything that i actually like#also i just hate changes (like with software i mean)#whether its simply a skill issue or because i'm autistic#having to deal with unwanted changes can severely stress me out#to the point of anxiety attacks or meltdowns#i hope and pray that i won't be like this forever that someday i can have more patience with this sort of thing#because i get it my stress over this stuff is ridiculous and i hate it#i just.. don't know what to do about it..#and it doesn't help that in this kind of context these things happen against my will and there's like nothing i can do about it#like yeah of course windows updated like 3 times in a row and messed with my crap#chances are i either can fix it but in an incredibly frustrating way or just have to deal with it#bluh windows updated that photo app. why does a photo viewing program need to constantly updated?? but anyways its like#its worse now. i can't even access the task bar while in it i have to hit the home button#and everything has been moved around and AI crap is showing up as if i want or need that for viewing photos#idk that's a tangent this has nothing to do with the post#i just hate updates
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